Gail loses 110 pounds and her Fibromyalgia fades

By Dr. Carol Look

Gail called me last week to resume EFT tapping sessions because of a recent breakup with her boyfriend. We had worked together over the telephone for weight loss over a year ago. "By the way," she wrote in an email... "I have made great progress and lost 110 pounds." Knowing this list would appreciate the details, I submit below the essence of my discussion with her (including some of the languaging involved..

Carol: I assume you have tried to lose weight in the past before you used EFT.

Gail: Over the past 30 years, I have been a yo-yo dieter. I actually added up that I have gained and lost approximately1000 pounds in my lifetime. I was bulimic in my twenties and have tried everything at one time or another.

Carol: Give me a sampling of what programs you've tried before.

Gail: I have been on every diet food plan and exercise plan out there. My first time joining Weight Watchers was when I was 13. I have been a member of WW 6 times since then. I have tried the no-carb, low-carb, low-fat, high-protein, the balancing programs like the Zone, the "Prozac Not Potatoes" book...everything. I tried following rules (no eating after 7:00 p.m., controlling portion size, eating slowly, not eating in the car, keeping food journals, calling someone else to tell them what I ate) and none of that worked either.

I have literally boxes of books on food, weight and exercise---I've tried every approach that's ever been written about. I've had my ears stapled, I've been hypnotized, I've been to nutritionists, I've had hair analysis, taken supplements. I've been on weight loss pills, the phen-phen craze. I've tried fasting, and all of the exercise programs. And I had horrible effects of feeling terrible and gaining even more weight back so I ended up heavier than when I started. I was never able to follow through and as a result I felt so much self-loathing. I really was a failure in this area.

Carol: What would you say made you relapse or not stick to any of these plans?

Gail: One thing, and that was "ANXIETY." I felt anxious about restricting my food. I felt like I was holding my breath under water and it was only a matter of time before I had to come up for air and start binge eating again. Also, I was a people pleaser and a highly sensitive person, and I could not manage my emotions when I wasn't overeating. I was constantly anxious if I wasn't pleasing someone else or if they were mad at me. I simply couldn't handle all of the anxiety.

Carol: Do you think EFT contributed to your dramatic weight loss, and if so, in what ways?

Gail: I not only think so, I am certain that it did. It was the most critical piece of all. I even would become resentful thinking it couldn't be this easy. After all, I had spent years trying as hard as I could, and struggling and hating myself for all of my failures. EFT worked in spite of my disbelief and even when I was resistant. You remember during some of the sessions I would tell you I hadn't been tapping in between sessions. Somehow it still got through. I actually think it was a miracle that I allowed it to happen.

Carol: I remember there were some really rough times though.

Gail: Yes, I would call for a session and just sob and sob. But I had had over a decade of talk therapy and ten years in Overeaters Anonymous, and I was never able to feel good after a session the way I was after an EFT session with you. I remember feeling astounded that I could go to the deepest pain and core issues during our telephone sessions, and then feel better and be able to pull myself together and go to work. It really impressed me that I could start a session in one emotional state and could come out the other end and go to work right afterward. That had never happened to me before.

Carol: What do you think were the toughest themes that we tapped for?

Gail: That would have to be the family stuff. I feared I would have to leave my family because they needed me to be sick. So if I got over my weight problem, I wouldn't belong with them anymore.

(My notes revealed the following phrases:

"Even though I am afraid of losing weight because I will feel disloyal to my family.....""Even though they need me to be sick, and I want to fit in....""Even though I'm afraid to lose weight, because I don't know who I would be...""Even though the thought of losing weight makes me feel threatened...""Even though I feel unlovable at the core, and don't feel valued unless I am DOING something, I choose to accept all of me.""Even though I feel undervalued and underappreciated..."

Carol: My notes showed that you also had a major fear of intimacy.

Gail: Yes, I knew in my heart that if I lost the weight, I'd get into another relationship. I had taken a hiatus from relationships for 14 years so I could try and feel safe. Instead I just felt worse. I was terrified that I couldn't have enough good boundaries in a new relationship. I never had before.

(More of my notes:

"Even though I'm afraid to feel vulnerable, and don't want to open up and get hurt again...""Even though I know I can't protect myself without the weight...""Even though I feel safer with this protection..."

Carol: And you contacted me now, over a year later since our first session, over some relationship issues, right?

Gail: Yes. I regret not tapping on my own, but I still did much better in the last relationship I had. I got out when I needed to when it wasn't good for me, and that showed a lot of progress. AND I did not gain any weight during the chaos of it. That's new. It didn't destroy me this time. I was able to love at a deeper level. I had a deeper capacity because I cared more about myself.

Carol: How else did EFT help you?

Gail: I got motivated with exercise. I was never ever able to stick with a program. Now I look forward to going to the gym I joined and want to go. I started to want to move once I started tapping with you last year.

Carol: What other themes do you remember tapping for in the sessions:

Gail: Well, beside the incredible self-loathing and feeling of being a failure, I remember tapping for feeling unworthy, not deserving to relax, feeling unlovable unless I'm doing something, and feeling like I never fit in. I was shocked at how much healing was accomplished in such a short amount of time.

(More notes:

"Even though I hate myself and my body, I deeply and completely love who I am...""Even though I hate myself for failing so many times...""Even though I feel trapped in my limited body and resent it...""Even though I am fat and I hate being fat and I hate all of me for being this way..."

Carol: Yes, we had less than 8 sessions from February to May, and then I didn't hear from you until October when you participated in one of my teleclass sessions. You had lost 70 pounds by October when you checked in.

Gail: And the amazing thing is, for the most part, I haven't felt like binge eating at all. It's not what I want to do. It's the first time in my life I haven't focused on the food. You got me to focus on the feelings instead. Now everyone asks me what food plan or diet I went on and they won't believe me when I tell them I refused to restrict my meals and haven't been on any kind of a diet in the past year!

Carol: They're looking for the answer in a diet plan or gym routine?

Gail: Right! I know that none of the other things--like the gym and refusing to diet-- would have fallen into place if it weren't for the tapping.

Carol: By the way, when I was looking over my notes, I saw that we worked on your Fibromyalgia pain. I hadn't remembered that.

Gail: Yes, I had been diagnosed with Fibromyalgia about 5 years earlier and lived with chronic pain and no energy. It was really horrible. It was all I could do to get my basic responsibilities completed.

Carol: How is the pain now?

Gail: I would say I probably don't have Fibromyalgia anymore. I haven't gone back to a doctor, but my symptoms are VIRTUALLY UNRECOGNIZABLE.

Carol: That's a wonderful side benefit. Thank you, Gail, for sharing your story with the EFT list. I know people will feel very encouraged.

Carol Look
EFT Contributing Editor

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