- Article Archive
- Cases
- Alzheimer's, "Absent tapping," & other experiences
- EFT and circumcision
- Low libido
- Suicidal client helped over the phone
- A blind man's erection problem
- Fasting??--try it on everything
- Using EFT on Paranoid Schizophrenia
- EFT helps trumpeter blow his own horn
- Clients with low energy--(Note: many suggestions from our members follow this message)
- Using "Setup Emphasis" for gout and other stubborn issues.
- Pulse rate improvement: From 130 to 90 in 1 minute
- Crohn's disease, gas, dental pain and a message from Albert Einstein
- Intentional EFT, enhancing romance and chewing cold things
- EFT on Schizophrenia
- Anaphylactic shock--"Before her eyes, the swelling began to go down."
- EFT, phone work and a business idea
- Migraines and a chocolate/cookies addiction
- Tapping with intention
- Breasts, body parts and self image concerns
- Feeling Responsible For Someone Else's Death
- Persistence, hemorrhoids & Uncle Bugs
- Two EFT success stories: pain & the opinions of others
- Contempt and the effects of projection
- Greg Nicosia on tapping with intention
- Puppy dog, wetting one's pants, stress & a "no results" case
- Delayed reaction to EFT--back pain & rape trauma
- Intentionality on an airplane
- Inside a successful schizophrenia case
- Apex problem--a response twist
- Emotional nose, burning house & golf questions
- A miscarriage and the recall of core issues.
- Tapping the finger points and the value of a hug
- EFT for growing larger breasts
- Using EFT for Fertility.
- Phantom limb pain
- Using EFT with frail people
- No more "conversations in my head"
- Pyrophobia, fear of medicines and working with groups over the phone.
- Rapport in the prison system--Part I of III
- Dental gagging and accepting oneself
- Jason's motion sickness
- EFT and self image
- Jet lag--tuning your time field
- Persistent tapping on several issues
- A question for digging deep
- Emotions, physical ailments and hidden issues
- More uses of EFT & a philosophical bent
- Tapping variations
- "Harry's" case and breathing suggestion
- Followup on EFT in the prison system
- Physical problems and persistence
- Using EFT on past life issues
- Core issues, sexual pleasure and "The Sins of Eve"
- Headaches, substance sensitivities, phone work, dental fears and grief
- How to become "unstuck"
- "But it doesn't work for me...."
- Down Syndrome and EFT
- There's something lacking in my career
- Her sinuses opened like a floodgate
- Balance problem, corns & autism
- Using EFT to enhance education skills
- Mourning the mother she's slowly losing
- Tapping brought us closer and made me understand
- A bridge for "Dr. Fred's" beliefs
- Food repulsion, email phobia, golf & rejection
- Plugged up ears, suicide and delayed reactions
- Working together on vertigo
- A how-to guide for using EFT with couples.
- Henry's phrase points to core issues
- Using EFT for severe mental retardation
- Dying gently
- Lactose intolerance--including a 6 month follow-up--see below
- Thought for the day
- Bringing down the barriers to a better bedroom
- Enhancing performance as a metaphor for life issues
- Mr Persistence, EFT and a brain tumor
- A teeny(?) and delightful success
- Business owner moves his business to the next level.
- Food repulsion: Green furry things and yucky tomatoes!
- An EFT "Pre-Beginner" reports success
- Warts
- Creative reframing: Satan to God
- Hip replacement, magic and miracles
- EFT with a mentally retarded patient
- A builder with psoriasis & little things
- EFT clears eczema.
- Loneliness and many, many aspects
- An uncontrollably sobbing client--"my mother didn't love me"
- "Bedside EFT" for patient relief in a hospital setting
- Expensive Emotions
- Niki LaMont on depression, pain and a water phobia
- Guilt over terminating a marriage
- Calming down a suicidal client
- The freedom to sing
- When a prisoner won't disclose the issue
- When pets have to pee...
- ...And he cried on my shoulder
- Hospice care and EFT
- How do I know the right words to say when I'm tapping?
- Alan--a mentally retarded client
- EFT "homework" and other messages
- What would love do here?
- Emergency uses for EFT
- A problem with Happy Birthday
- Expert golfers, EFT and comfort zones
- Men only want one thing
- Tinkie said, "I don't fit in"
- Cholesterol and EFT
- Free to pee
- Programming dreams with EFT
- When you gotta go...
- Critical Incident Stress Debriefing
- Insight--"I'm terrified I'm going to be like my father"
- Sales performance
- Press Releases
- EFT in the News
- Stories
- Weight Loss
- Editorials
- Frequently Asked Questions
- Does EFT work on______?
- How long do the results last?
- EFT is obvious! So why wasn't it discovered many decades ago?
- Does it matter whether or not the EFT practitioner is skeptical?
- How do I use EFT for___________?
- When EFT relieves pain, does it mask the pain and thus thwart the ability for pain to signal danger?
- I'm used to affirmations being stated in the positive. Why does the EFT Setup language focus on the negative? What if I used positive statements instead?
- Are EFT's results due to either placebo effects or distraction?
- Using EFT for Epilepsy and seizures
- Are there suggested guidelines for professionals regarding an Informed Consent Statement?
- How do I apply EFT for performance issues?
- Are there any negative side effects or abreactions?
- Can EFT cause a client to "feel worse?"
- How do I introduce EFT to skeptics?
- Are there any problems using EFT for pregnancy?
- Can I be effective with "just the basics?"
- How do I handle Hand-Me-Down EFT?
- How do I choose the language to use while doing EFT?
- Can we do EFT surrogately or through intention? If so do we need permission?
- How do I handle the "Big One?"
- How do I find a client's "hidden issues?"
- What procedures might be taken if a client is undergoing a medical emergency?
- When it doesn't work....???
- What do I do when the clients stop tapping even though they have had substantial success with EFT?
- How does EFT differ from Thought Field Therapy (TFT)?
- What's a good way for newcomers to apply EFT to themselves?
- Why do you sell it so inexpensively?
- Can EFT be combined with other techniques?
- How do I find answers to my EFT questions?
- How do you help a "non-feeling" client?
- What do I say while performing EFT?
- Fear
- Humor
- The Wisdom of a Witch
- GOLF GAME
- Phrases from the 50's - Part 3
- Bad Day
- CEO Blunder
- Great Truths That Little Children Have Learned
- Airline Maintenance
- BEING COOL
- HOLLYWOOD SQUARES - THE GOOD OLD DAYS - PART 3
- Deep Thoughts
- Near Death Experience
- Walk A Mile
- AN INTERESTING PHILOSOPHY
- THE HISTORY OF WIRELESS
- Calories That Don't Count
- Cold Cream
- The Mountain Man and the Army
- Why Indeed ...?
- University Safety Committee
- 80% Agreement
- The English Schoolteacher
- Let Sleeping Dogs Lie
- Two-Cow Philosophy
- Untold Riches
- Abbott and Costello meet Windows 95
- WHEN INSULTS HAD CLASS
- Creative Definitions - Part 2
- The Price of Good Health
- COURTROOM BLOOPERS
- Bargaining with God
- A Good Explanation
- The Man I Marry
- Hasty Headlines
- New Business Model
- Amish and Elevator
- A Pain in the Leg
- And that
- Three Dogs...and a Collie
- BIZARRE DRIVING LAWS - Part 1
- Coming Mergers
- Life Before the Computer
- Computer Help Desk
- Life Support
- Women in Leather
- GREETINGS AND BEST WISHES FROM A LAW FIRM
- PRAYING FOR PEACE
- Bad Weather
- Chemistry Final Exam
- The Four Stages of Life
- Airline Maintenance
- BIKERS
- HOLLYWOOD SQUARES - THE GOOD OLD DAYS
- Deep Voice
- Annual Neologism Contest
- Army Insurance
- TRIBUTE TO BOB HOPE- Part I
- Computer Haikus
- Calories That Don't Count
- Commuting Hazards
- Winning the Lottery
- Why Indeed ...?
- A Well-Planned Retirement
- A Little Mixed Up
- Fifty Fun Things to do in an Elevator
- The Spanish Computer
- The Bank Robber
- Colorful Shipwreck
- Accuracy!
- WHEN INSULTS HAD CLASS
- Creative Definitions - Part 3
- Now That
- COURTROOM BLOOPERS
- Baseball in Heaven
- HMO
- Thirty Lines to Make You Smile
- Hasty Headlines
- MEMO
- Ancient Artifact?
- A Moral Lesson
- And that
- Is It Better To Be A Jock Or A Nerd?
- BIZARRE DRIVING LAWS - Part 2
- Funny Sayings - Part 1
- Funny Sayings - Part 2
- Computer Swallowed Grandma
- Martha Stewart Holiday Schedule
- Strange Laws - Part 1
- 24 SIGNS YOU MIGHT BE CANADIAN
- OLDER and WISER
- The Bartender
- Circulatory Exam
- Success
- Survivors
- BILL GATES BUYS A HOUSE
- HOLLYWOOD SQUARES - THE GOOD OLD DAYS - PART 5
- The Definition of Barbecuing
- Not My Job
- On the Phone with with Technical Support
- TRIBUTE TO BOB HOPE - Part II
- Computer Haikus
- Calories That Don't Count
- Congressional Mugging
- Kids and Proverbs - Part 1
- Why Indeed ...?
- Dear God
- A New Teacher
- Finally! Answers About Marriage
- Talking Dog
- Signs & Notices
- Beethoven's Grave
- Adoption
- Amazingly Simple Home Remedies
- The Perfect Man
- Marriage Names
- A TEST FOR PROFESSIONALS
- Beer, Fishing, Golf and Sex
- How To Lie To The Bathroom Scale
- Twelve Step Recovery Plan
- Hasty Headlines
- Estate Planning Basics
- Astrological Light Bulbs
- Kindergarten Wisdom
- And that
- The Old Golfer
- BIZARRE DRIVING LAWS - Part 3
- Funny Sayings - Part 3
- Computers and Companies
- Microsoft vs. GM
- Strange Laws - Part 2
- THE GOOD HUSBAND
- THOSE WERE THE DAYS - Part 1
- Baseball Quote
- City Slicker
- Airline Travel: The Next Generation
- George Carlin's Views on Aging
- BIRTHDAY SURPRISE
- Funny Sayings
- Proper Diskette Usage and Care
- Only in Merry Old England
- Punctuation Is Everything
- TRIBUTE TO BOB HOPE - Part III
- Computer Haikus
- Camping Trip
- Consultant
- Kids and Proverbs - Part 2
- Why Indeed ...?
- In Memoriam
- Accident report
- The Fire Truck
- Signs That Technology Has Taken Over Your Life
- Signs & Notices
- Goofy Conversions
- Addicted to Coffee
- Professional Advice
- The Bottle of Wine
- Marriage Names
- PICABO
- How to Give the Cat a Pill
- Humor From the Church
- Understanding Engineers
- Hasty Headlines
- Dad Math
- At the Inn...
- A Christian Upbringing
- Have You Heard?
- Scared Straight...For Math
- Do you REALLY need email??
- Funny Sayings - Part 4
- Creation Retold
- Having Trouble with Microsoft Word
- Strange Laws - Part 3
- ITALIAN PASTA DIET
- THOSE WERE THE DAYS - Part 2
- Bathroom Sign
- Class Reunion
- THE LAWS OF INCONVENIENCE
- Calling God
- THE BLARNEY STONE
- Funny Sayings - Part 7
- If A Dog Were Your Teacher
- Politically Correct Holiday Greeting
- A Rope Went into a Bar...
- How Smart Is Your Right Foot?
- WORDS TO LIVE BY
- Canine Complex
- Cuff Links
- Kids and Proverbs - Part 3
- THE ARROGANT INSPECTOR
- The 'Middle Wife'
- Aging Perspective
- Flight Announcements
- The Sex of a Fly
- Honest Advertising
- Intermission Hijinks
- After-Thanksgiving Poem
- AN ODE TO ENGLISH PLURALS
- Getting Older
- Marriage Names
- A FROG STORY
- Cheap Therapy
- Husband 101
- Having Fun in Wal Mart
- Hasty Headlines
- Time Out
- A Change of Vows
- Farmer
- How Banks Work
- Stern Sibling
- TALKIN
- 25 Signs You've Grown Up
- SAFARI SURVIVAL
- Funny Sayings - Part 5
- Dear Dad
- Miracle
- Swapping Professional Secrets
- THE FINAL WORD ON NUTRITION AND HEALTH
- YEP
- Cakes and Ale
- Classified Ads
- THE LAWS OF INCONVENIENCE
- A Bed Near The Window
- NAME THAT BOAT
- Funny Sayings - Part 8
- Dog Thoughts
- The Perfect Husband
- Product Labels
- Toys for Today
- What I've Learned by Having Boys
- The C.E.O.
- Cured
- Kids and Proverbs - Part 4
- DADDY, HOW WAS I BORN???
- My First Mammogram
- Are You Ready For Children?
- For Those Who Need a Chuckle
- The Helicopter
- Give a Man a Fish...
- Band Insect
- Afternoon Rounds
- AN ODE TO ENGLISH PLURALS - PART 2
- Write it Down?
- Marriage Names
- WHY GOD MADE MOMS
- Chuckles
- Are You An Internet Addict?
- Washing Your Cat
- Speeding Ticket
- The Concept of Marriage
- The 84-year-old Newlywed
- The Company Picnic
- Eternal Devotion
- Car Warning
- I Think I Need a Computer
- DINNER INVITATION
- QUALITY ASSURANCE
- HOLLYWOOD SQUARES - THE GOOD OLD DAYS (PART 1)
- Dear Bubba
- Missing
- Good Communication
- MAN
- YEP
- Call Center
- Classified Ads
- THE LAWS OF INCONVENIENCE
- Monastery Life
- BY THE BOOK
- Funny Sayings - Part 9
- Why Dogs Can't Use Computers
- Politically Correct About Men
- Product Labels
- Job Competition
- What I've Learned by Having Boys
- EYEGLASSES
- Cyclic Number
- Kids and Proverbs - Part 5
- COURTROOM BLOOPERS
- Monkey Business
- Bad Puns
- For Those Who Take Life Too Seriously
- The Human Race is Doomed
- Photogenic?
- RESTAURANT MATH
- RESERVATIONS OF AN AIRLINE AGENT
- Quick Jokes
- Detective Mom
- A Novel Approach to Saving Money
- WHY GOD MADE MOMS
- How to Clean the Toilet
- Internet Police
- Why Learn English Part 1
- Where Is God ?
- Phrases from the 50's - Part 1
- New Year's Resolutions -- Over Time
- Phrases from the 50's - Part 2
- The Minister and the Funeral
- Case Closed
- Having a Bad Day
- Airline Maintenance
- A DRY TOWN
- HOLLYWOOD SQUARES - THE GOOD OLD DAYS - PART 2
- Deep Observations on Life
- Out of the Mouths of Babes
- Wash. Biol. Surv.
- WOMEN OVER 40
- CHASING RABBITS
- Call Policy
- Classified Ads
- Fried Eggs
- Why Indeed ...?
- The Talking Dog
- The best road rage!
- Eating Oreos
- Signage
- Product Labels
- Skydiver
- Most ridiculous British laws:
- WHEN INSULTS HAD CLASS
- Creative Definitions - Part 1
- Mourning the Mayonnaise
- COURTROOM BLOOPERS
- Comments made in the year 1955!
- A Barbie we can relate to
- Fresh New Perspectives
- The Male Perspective
- Pull Over!
- Dalmation Duties
- Airline Food
- Painting the Porch
- Aging Gracefully
- Animal Super Bowl
- WHY GOD MADE MOMS
- The Clergyman
- A Kitten's Prayer
- Why Learn English Part 2
- DAILY THOUGHTS FROM DOGS AND CATS
- Inspiration
- Mean old Moms
- Are Your Potatoes Heavy
- Better Far to Risk A Fall
- Here I Grow Again
- Shake It Off and Step Up
- Look Mommy
- Start With Yourself
- Attitude
- Cerebral Palsy and a flower inside a cocoanut shell
- Kitten From Heaven
- To Track Down My Dream
- Creating Destiny
- Making Sandcastles
- You Sure Are Lucky...
- Determination
- The Magic of Hope
- 57 CENTS
- Broken Wing
- Infecting the World
- Flying
- Others at their best
- Are you God
- AN ENLIGHTENED PERSPECTIVE - Part 2
- Roses of Life
- Real Heroes
- Attitude determines everything
- If You Were
- The Boy and the Worm
- House of 1000 Mirrors
- The Star Polisher
- Magic Mommy Kisses
- A Determined Spirit
- The Magical Tablecloth
- Challenged
- Lesson
- Which one are you?
- Asking God
- The Pickle Jar
- Cookies
- Dig a Little Deeper
- May You Have...
- The Angel on Hwy 109
- Be Thankful
- Five Short Chapters on Change
- Follow the Leader
- Point of View
- Unforgiveness
- AN ENLIGHTENED PERSPECTIVE - Part 3
- A Sioux Indian Story
- A lesson in attitude
- Before It's Too Late
- EXPLANATION OF GOD
- The Mustard Seed
- The little boy with a bad temper
- How Do You Think?
- Stray Cat
- The Fisherman and The Investment Banker
- The Trouble Tree
- Whispers
- I Tried to Climb the Mountain Today
- Letter From a Farm Kid
- Whiners
- Crayola Bomb
- The Sneeze
- A Drunk Fell in a Hole
- Million Dollar Lesson
- SLOW DANCE
- The Loving Picture that will never leave your memory
- Secret of Success
- Good Corn
- Positive Side of Life
- Ugly
- The Balloon Man
- Great Opportunity
- Positive Thinking
- The Best Medicine
- GOSSIP
- Miss Isabel
- Boy Wanted
- I Love You
- The Carpenter
- Customer Service From Heaven
- Paid In Full
- The 30 Second Quiz
- Count Your Blessings
- Lincoln and Failure
- Wisdom from Oscar
- Twenty Four Crowded Hours
- A Newborn's Conversation with God
- Eating the Cookie
- Nice Kids
- Explanation of God by an 8 year old boy
- AN EXERCISE IN GRATITUDE - Part 1
- Defining Success
- Mom - Job Description
- There is beauty in everything
- A Group of Frogs
- The Race
- Does it Still Serve a Purpose?
- THE MEANING OF LIFE
- Time to Learn
- A Builder or a Wrecker?
- The Impossible Dream
- The Horseman
- Optimism
- Heaven and Hell
- The Seven Wonders of the World
- True Story of Courage and Love
- The Lonely Road
- Wisdom
- This is What Love is All About
- The Value of Time
- Embassy of Hope
- No Matter What Happens
- WHAT IS LOVE? (Part 1)
- AN EXERCISE IN GRATITUDE - Part 2
- Forsaken?
- The Joy of Gratitude
- Beauty tips
- Handwriting On The Wall
- Raised as a Chicken
- Distance Never Separates
- THREE DAYS TO SEE
- When You Thought I Wasn't Looking
- A Butterfly Hovers
- The Jag
- The Ones Who Care
- To Have Succeeded
- Letter To My Grandchildren
- What do Angels Look Like?
- Covering All the Bases
- Love software
- World's Greatest Psychotherapist
- The Obstacle in Our Path
- The Weight of a Burden
- He Failed His Way To The Top
- Not The Critic
- WHAT IS LOVE? (Part 2)
- AN EXERCISE IN GRATITUDE - Part 3
- The Emperor's Seed
- That's all I remember!
- The best day of my life
- Happiness
- The Reflection
- Don't Go To Bed
- Good People
- And This Too Shall Pass
- By Changing...
- Jars of Clay
- To Build A Bridge
- The Dates that Matter
- The Precious Gift
- State Of The World Message
- Cross My Heart
- Love and the papers everyone kept
- The World's Most Communicative Disease
- Strongest Dad in the World
- Children Learn What They Live
- The Final Exam
- Now and Beyond
- WHAT IS LOVE? (Part 3)
- ANGELS IN THE POST OFFICE
- Sioux Indian Story
- The Archer and the Arrow
- The best time of my life
- Healing Garden
- Rich or Poor?
- The Elderly Caretaker
- The Wise Sage
- Miguel's Poem
- Capt. Laurent Gourley...8-6-69
- Just Be
- To Risk
- Misfits
- My Resignation
- My Comfort Zone
- The Daffodil Principle
- Lucky's Greatest Treasure
- You are so beautiful to me
- The Cab Ride I'll Never Forget
- A Sweet Lesson in Humanity
- The Firth of Forth Bridge
- On Failure
- No Matter What Happens
- AN ENLIGHTENED PERSPECTIVE - Part 1
- Keep Your Dream
- Research
- Assessment of the Emotional Freedom Technique: An Alternative Treatment for Fear - The Waite & Holder Study
- Evaluation of a Meridian-Based Intervention, Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT), for Reducing Specific Phobias of Small Animals
- Self-administered EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) in individuals with fibromyalgia: a randomized trial
- The Treatment of Combat Trauma in Veterans Using EFT
- Energy Psychology: a review of the preliminary evidence
- Energy psychology in disaster relief
- The effects of EFT on long-term psychological symptoms
- Neurophysiological Indicators of EFT Treatment Of Post-Traumatic Stress
- Studies Accepted in Peer Reviewed Journals
- Rapid Treatment of PTSD: Why Psychological Exposure with Acupoint Tapping May Be Effective
- Theoretical and Methodological Problems in Research on Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) and Other Meridian Based Therapies
- Six Trauma Imprints Treated with Combination Intervention: Critical Incident Stress Debriefing and Thought Field Therapy (TFT) or Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT)
- Psychological Symptom Change in Veterans After Six Sessions of Emotional freedom Techniques (EFT); An Observational Study
- Pilot Study of EFT, WHEE and CBT for Treatment of Test Anxiety in University Students
- The Effect of Progressive Muscular Relaxation and Emotional Freedom Techniques on Test Anxiety in High School Students: A Randomized Controlled Trial
- Veterans: Finding their way home with EFT--an observational study
- The Neurochemistry of Counterconditioning: Acupressure Desensitization in Psychotherapy
- Clinical Story of a 6-Year-Old Boy's Eating Phobia; An Integrated Approach
- Change Is Possible: EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) with Life-Sentence and Veteran Prisoners at San Quentin State Prison
- The Effect of a Brief EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) Self-Intervention on Anxiety, Depression, Pain and Cravings in Healthcare Workers
- Energy Psychology in Rehabilitation: Origins, Clinical Applications, and Theory
- Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) For Traumatic Brain Injury
- The Effect of EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) on Athletic Performance: A Randomized Controlled Blind Trial
- Thought Field Therapy and its derivatives: rapid relief of mental health problems through tapping on the body
- Studies Presented at Professional Conferences
- Measuring Physiological Markers of Emotional Trauma: A Randomized Controlled Trial of Mind-Body Therapies
- The Effect of EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) on Psychological Symptoms: A Limited Replication
- The Effect of EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) on Psychological Symptoms in Addiction Treatment
- The effect of an energy psychology intervention (EFT) versus diaphragmatic breathing on specific
- World Trade Center Tower 2 Survivor: EP Treatment of Long-term PTSD:
- Psychological Trauma in Veterans using EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques): A Randomized Controlled Trial
- Does Prolonged Exposure Need to Hurt in Order to Help? Exploring Two Alternatives
- Other Studies and Experiments
- An EFT study: Reducing anxiety in dental patients with EFT
- EFT for Libido: Study Results Summarized -- 80% report an improvement of 50% or more
- Preliminary Report of the First Large-Scale Study of Energy Psychology
- Clear evidence that our emotions affect our body--in this case, dramatic changes in the blood
- The results of Carol Look's eyesight experiment
- Articles evidencing the existence of energy meridians
- EFT improves Minerals, Amino Acids & Vitamins
- Before and after photos of Rouleaux--"blood cell clumping"
- An Objective Experiment on the Use of EFT for Depression
- Cases
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Article Archive
Cases
Men only want one thing
Important Note: This article was written prior to 2010 and is now outdated. Please use my newest advancement, Optimal EFT. It is more efficient, more powerful and clearly explained in my free e-book, The Unseen Therapist™. Best wishes, Gary
Hi Everyone,
This is about core issues, humor and using reframes with EFT.
I met "Alice" at a friend's house over the Holidays. She sat in her chair most of the time because her ankles were too painful when she walked. She was age 50, substantially overweight (approx. 300 lbs) and spoke in monotones as if protecting herself from being happy or enthusiastic. She was good at pleasant conversation, but nary a smile did I see.
As often happens when I am at gatherings, the conversation turned to EFT. Naturally, several well meaning friends who were "in the know" about EFT pushed for Alice and I to get together. The hope was that EFT would "take care of her ankles." So, after dinner we found a quiet room and began a conversation that went like this....
GC: When did your ankles first start to bother you?
ALICE: About a year and a half ago.
GC: I gather you've been to doctors about your ankle pains.
ALICE: Yes, several. I'm on three medications and none of them seem to work very well. I get some temporary relief, but that's about it.
GC: Are there any other problems?
ALICE: Yes. Over the last year I've been getting pains in my arms, shoulders and back. No one seems to know why.
GC: OK. Let's try a round or two of EFT for the ankle pain. "Even though I have these ankle pains...."
Note: After three rounds there was no result. Her ankle pains, while sitting, were at a constant 6. At this point, I could have gotten more specific and addressed something like, "the pain in the right side of my left ankle" but I chose instead to go for emotional contributors. This was a fairly easy decision, by the way, because her overweight condition, protective monotone speech and deadpan face were SHOUTING for emotional relief. Her body, it seemed, was generating physical signs (pain) as a reflection of her lack of emotional peace.
GC: Was there a difficult emotional event that happened prior to your ankle pains?
ALICE: Yes. Louie shattered my heart.
GC: How so?
ALICE: I've never done well with men. They always seduce me and get me into bed for awhile. They make promises that get my hopes up and then they drop me.
GC: Always?
ALICE: Yes. Louie was just the most recent. Before Louie I was celibate for 10 years. Too much pain involved in going down that road. I would rather "do without."
GC: So why did you get involved with Louie?
ALICE: I thought he would be different. But he wasn't. After some sweet talking promises and several weeks in the bedroom, he left. He never called me back and didn't answer my calls. Men only want one thing.
GC: Men only want one thing?
ALICE: Yes! Men only want one thing.
GC: Is that an exaggeration?
ALICE: No! It is the TRUTH and there are no exceptions (said with anger).
Note: This was the first sign of any animation in her demeanor--although it wasn't exactly a candidate for the Jovial Gesture of the Month Club. At this point, it was becoming clear that Alice's issues were very global and centered around love, acceptance, rejection and related issues. Her "men only want one thing" belief appeared to be a symptom of a much larger issue known as "I'm not lovable."
It was also becoming clear that we were not going to get an EFT "one minute wonder" out of this. The "I'm not lovable" issue is very pervasive and is usually loaded with individual events that give rise to this belief. This is a many-session issue and all we had was a little "after dinner time" to address it. So, I thought I would try to at least loosen things up a bit by aiming at the "men only want one thing" belief.
GC: Are you angry that men only want one thing?
ALICE: Of course!
GC: Why be angry at the TRUTH?
ALICE: What do you mean?
GC: Well.....are you angry at gravity?
ALICE: No, but that's an absurd question. No one gets angry at gravity.
Note: This "gravity thing" was an attempt at a reframe that was done BEFORE we used EFT. Even the most creative reframes rarely land well without the prior cognitive shifts that occur through tapping.
GC: OK. Tap with me. (I had her tap up and down her body on all the points while saying the following things) "Even though men only want one thing..."
ALICE: Even though men only want one thing...
GC: and I'm angry about that...
ALICE: and I'm angry about that...
GC: because if they would only behave the way I want them to...
ALICE: because if they would only behave the way I want them to...
GC: and live THEIR lives according to MY rules...
ALICE: and live THEIR lives according to MY rules...
GC: I wouldn't feel so unloved.
ALICE: I wouldn't feel so unloved. (instant tears--Bingo)
pause
GC: Every woman should feel the way I do about men....
ALICE: Every woman should feel the way I do about men...
GC: and they should choose celibacy just like me....
ALICE: And they should choose celibacy just like me.... (a glimmer of a smile)
GC: because I know the TRUTH.
ALICE: because I know the TRUTH. (her first real smile)
GC: For some reason...
ALICE: For some reason...
GC: I'm not angry at gravity...
ALICE: I'm not angry at gravity....
GC: even though gravity is also the TRUTH.
ALICE: even though gravity is also the TRUTH.
GC: I mean, think about it...
ALICE: I mean, think about it....
GC: gravity keeps me stuck on this earth so I can't fly about at will...
ALICE: gravity keeps me stuck on this earth so I can't fly about at will...
GC: and it makes my body sag...
ALICE: and it makes my body sag...
GC: and contributes to my ankle pains...
ALICE: and contributes to my ankle pains...
GC: and I can't do diddly about it.
ALICE: and I can't do diddly about it. (big smile)
pause
GC: I don't know why I pardon gravity for being what it is....
ALICE: I don't know why I pardon gravity for being what it is...
GC: but get angry at men for only wanting one thing.
ALICE: but get angry at men for only wanting one thing.
GC: I wonder why I get rather selective about which TRUTH to vent my wrath upon....
ALICE: I wonder why I get rather selective about which TRUTH to vent my wrath upon....
GC: and punish it by being celibate.
ALICE: and punish it by being celibate. (she laughs--the reframes are landing well)
pause
GC: If men only want one thing...
ALICE: If men only want one thing....
GC: then why shouldn't I accept that, like I do gravity.....
ALICE: then why shouldn't I accept that, like I do gravity....
GC: and enjoy it....
ALICE: and enjoy it....
GC: instead of confusing it with deeper issues, like not feeling loved as a child.
ALICE: instead of confusing it with deeper issues, like not feeling loved as a child.
Note: This last phrase hit the bulls eye and a noticeable "A-HA" came over her face. All the rest of the reframes were building to this one realization. We finished the session with a little levity which also seemed to do away with her monotone speech.
GC: There is probably some truth to "men only want one thing".....
ALICE: There is probably some truth to "men only want one thing".....
GC: just like there's probably some truth to "women are attracted to men for their money."
ALICE: just like there's probably some truth to "women are attracted to men for their money."
GC: But they may not be absolutely true.
ALICE: But they may not be absolutely true.
GC: Perhaps I can treat them more flexibly in my belief system...
ALICE: Perhaps I can treat them more flexibly in my belief system...
GC: instead of confusing my past rejections with men's erections.
ALICE: instead of confusing my past rejections with men's erections. (she laughs)
GC: I suffer needlessly from erection rejection.
ALICE: I suffer needlessly from erection rejection. (another laugh)
GC: Maybe my reflections upon men's erections need some corrections.
ALICE: Maybe my reflections upon men's erections need some corrections. (a major belly laugh)
This was a stopping point. We had, within 15 or 20 minutes, lightened up the excuse of "men only want one thing" and pointed toward the deeper problem. Along the way, the tapping removed her emotional resistance to the reframes, thereby allowing them to land. There is still much to do, of course. This was just a beginning.
Her ankle pain wasn't any better after the session but the deadpan face and the monotone speech were nowhere to be found...and...she had a much different perspective on "men only want one thing."
Hugs, Gary
P.S. Sex is a fascinating topic. Depending on one's perspective, it gives rise to everything from ecstasy to shame. For many people, it occupies their thoughts far more than any other subject. Perhaps we should have a national holiday dedicated to Sex. We could call it...Only One Thing Day.
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