- Articles & Ideas
- Being Specific
- Tapping on specific events without knowing what they are
- What to do when you can't find your own specific events or issues
- Two cases: (1) Being Specific and (2) Being General
- EFT for the Soul - global versus specific approaches
- EFT for a bashful bladder - a beautiful example of going for SPECIFIC EVENTS
- How to collapse multiple SPECIFIC EVENTS in one Borrowing Benefits session
- Using NLP to Chunk Down for specifics in an EFT session
- Ann Adams on BEING SPECIFIC
- Find Early Specific Events
- The importance of being specific in the EFT Setup Phrase
- How to apply EFT when there are no clear, specific memories to tap on
- Surrogate tapping for terrorists
- Surrogate EFT Taken Another Step - Clearing Ancestral (Foundational) Issues
- Surrogate tapping and collarbone breathing
- Helping Helpers: Using Surrogate EFT for Emergencies
- Solid motivation to use Surrogate EFT
- Surrogate EFT for Chronic Pulmonary Obstruction Disorder
- Surrogate/distance tapping for Cassie the dog
- "Seeing" disrupted energy enhances mental (surrogate) tapping
- Surrogate EFT to help patients going through medical procedures
- Surrogate EFT arrests a grand mal seizure
- Beth's Stalker Problem Resolved with Surrogate EFT
- Successful surrogate tapping for schizophrenic son
- A surrogate EFT Teddy Bear became a special friend for a housebound woman
- Responses to questions on surrogate muscle testing
- Simple uses of Surrogate EFT during every day conversations
- What to do in the hospital
- Surrogate EFT -- "The pain is leaving now through my fingertips."
- Surrogate EFT substantially aids incontinence, anger, dementia and hearing loss.
- Skeptic of surrogate EFT becomes a believer
- Surrogate tapping stops serious nose bleed
- A touching story: Easing Mary's death through surrogate EFT
- How to do Intentional (or Surrogate) EFT--a 4 Part Series
- Using surrogate EFT for easing a courtroom testimony
- A followup after a surrogate session in Albuquerque--Betsy's impressive results
- Successful Surrogate EFT for Seizures
- Breathing problems, surrogate tapping, depression and Try it on Everything
- Surrogate tapping on an "Entity"
- After trying a different approach for Surrogate EFT, a crying baby quiets down
- Resolving a family fight with surrogate EFT
- Surrogate tapping on a sneezing attack, Successful use of EFT on a raspy throat AND arm wrestling success using only two fingers.
- Surrogate EFT relieves baby
- Some thoughts about surrogate (remote) EFT
- Turning the Movie Technique into a cartoon helps with Dysautonomia episode
- Discovering "core scenes"
- A short version of the Collar Bone Breathing Technique
- Stepping back from the movie in the EFT Movie Technique
- The "Let it be Easy" Technique
- EFT and the Double Bubble technique: Or how to successfully deal with chronic issues!
- Variations on EFT's Movie Technique
- Doing the EFT Constricted Breathing Technique a few times a day increased Paul
- The Stepping into Neutral Technique
- Everyday EFT to Create a Fabulous Life--The Emotional Joy Technique
- The Argument Tapping Technique
- Doing the EFT Movie Technique in slow motion -- getting to important and otherwise hidden aspects
- The "Tap while you Gripe" Technique
- The EFT Imagineering Technique
- Gwyneth Moss's Imagineering Technique for Endometriosis
- The "Turbo-Tapping" Technique
- The Bundling Movie Technique for gently addressing long term abuse cases
- Refusal Tapping Technique
- The Volcano Technique
- The Movie Technique for kinesthetic learners
- Behind the Scenes of the Movie Technique
- For procrastination: The "Feel the Feeling" Technique
- Creative Uses of The EFT Movie Technique
- Living your Dreams with The Hero Technique
- The Gratitude Diet - A Thanksgiving Technique
- Time and Reframing: An Easy Technique that Generates Fast Results
- The benefits of describing EFT as a relaxation technique
- Testing our work and personal radiation
- Useful ways to expand the EFT Set-up Phrase
- Using "It's In Here" in the EFT Setup phrase
- Touch And Breathe--TAB Paper
- Using the 9 Gamut Procedure when emotion gets "stuck in the right brain"
- Jarrod Bailey from Australia experiments with EFT Setup Phrases and explains his findings
- Injecting "want to" into the EFT Setup language
- EFT Imagineering cleared lungs and improved breathing
- Tapping on both sides of the body, on feel-good points only, then taking deep breaths after each point
- Dr. Carol Look discusses the importance of testing in EFT
- The advantages of using the 9 Gamut Procedure
- EFT to clear chakras and increase vibration
- Using the EFT setup statement as a a pledge
- Adding muscle testing to EFT
- Effectively using "What if" in the EFT Setup Phrase
- A creative way to develop EFT Setup statements
- Testing your EFT work - The
- The Alternate Phrase Technique--tapping on both sides of a conflict.
- Ideas on Muscle Testing, EFT and Developing Intuition
- Why do we use negatives in the EFT setup statement?
- Gwyneth Moss on Reality Testing
- How do I choose the phrases to use while doing EFT?
- Soft language to ease The EFT Set-Up Phrases
- Ideas for enhancing the standard EFT Setup
- How Do You Know What To Say For an EFT Setup Phrase?
- A New Way to Use the
- A useful EFT phrase--"Reclaiming" all our possibilities
- EFT gives relief to a self-cutter by first finding emotional causes
- Anja shares her self-healing process
- Getting the most out of self-help books with EFT
- Self sabotage-healing the parts that don
- S-L-O-W EFT for self help on broad issues
- Give Yourself a Gift by Creating an EFT Journal
- Resolving childhood issues with EFT increases compassion for self
- Billy McCombie self applies EFT for an impressive list of benefits
- Paradoxes in validating one's Self
- When self acceptance becomes a problem...
- EFT for relief from feeling responsible for everyone else before taking care of self
- Tapping for negative self-talk - "I am unable to step out of it"
- Steve Wells series on EFT and Self-Acceptance--Part 1 of 4--(subsequent parts given below)
- EFT improves self esteem
- Rue Hass on "I deeply and completely accept myself"
- The role of self-punishment in Dis-ease
- Self acceptance without judgment
- A Complex Case - Doubts and Self-empowerment - The Return of Hair and more
- Julie Howard uses EFT for being hard on herself
- EFT As a Conversation With Yourself
- Self Image: An insightful look at the "Writings on our Walls"
- EFT for Self Confidence
- EFT for the lingering effects of a brain tumor from 12 years before
- Surrogate EFT for Yourself
- Frances Songhurst finally gets a rapid result for herself
- Developing self compassion with persistent EFT
- The 3-2-1 process: untangling yourself from others
- Mary Hunt on Intuition: Getting yourself out of the way.
- Thoughts on Surrogate EFT and "getting yourself out of the way"
- Freeing our "Critical Mind" into Self Acceptance with EFT
- Using "I love THAT about myself" in the EFT process
- Tapping on one's self talk--a great idea for collapsing our "inner critic"
- EFT helps a man look people in the eye
- Karen's thoughts on self forgiveness
- EFT Speeds Rehabilitation and Physical Therapy: Irene Mitchell Update
- How To Tell In Advance Whether An EFT Practitioner Has Sufficient Skill in EFT
- How to use EFT when the client won't reveal the issue
- Dr. Pat Carrington's "EFT At Work In A Hospital" Series
- Client has Somatic Release that involved shaking in a seizure-like fashion
- How to Build Your EFT Practice by Leveraging Your Biggest Resource
- Physical therapy like it should be--dramatic improvements in a rehab center
- When clients get overwhelmed or frustrated with EFT
- When clients can
- Conversations with Dr. Mercola -- Part 6 of 7
- Tips for when clients have difficulty accessing their feelings
- Hearing voices and multiple issues relieved: "One session of EFT does more for me than years of [conventional] therapy ever could."
- Is Your Chosen EFT Practitioner Really Helping You?
- Some thoughts about doing EFT with multilingual clients
- Curtis Steele, MD shares his thoughts and experiences using EFT in a psychiatric practice
- Good reasons for using an EFT Practitioner
- Ingrid Dinter's Box Technique for helping a client wind down when time is running out in a session
- EFT used to calm down a client during a severe seizure episode
- Working through the pain and fear in the midst of divorce
- EFT'er encourages clients to find their favorite EFT points
- Conversations with Dr. Mercola -- Part 7 of 7
- The Emotional Scale in EFT Practice
- A detailed EFT oriented session via email for a client with serious issues
- The Pros and Cons of EFT Telephone Therapy
- Did EFT help Gayla's client reduce the blockage in his arteries?
- What stops clients from pursuing their dreams?
- Surrogate EFT used to calm down a bi-polar client
- Why see an EFT practitioner?
- Fitting EFT within the client's belief system
- Limiting beliefs may limit your EFT practice
- Making A Great Impression With Your New EFT Client
- Conversations with Dr. Mercola - Part 1 of 7
- EFT with a schizophrenic client
- 4 Part Series on Helping Clients with their 0-10 Accuracy
- Psychosis: Hearing Voices--EFT achieves more in one session than 13 years of medications and traditional therapy.
- Karen Donaldson Highlights Some "Slimming Down" Successes With Her Clients -- Many Side Issues Explored
- Surrogate EFT brings calming effect to Schizophrenic client
- Yet another impressive use of Surrogate EFT--this time an audience sends the client out of the room and taps for her
- The Many Factors Affecting Client Motivation and Follow Through
- If the client starts shaking...
- If your client believes that the world is run by a red elephant....
- What to do when your client is beset by an "evil monster"
- Using EFT to create positive self beliefs for a client who deems herself "not good enough"
- Successful Surrogate EFT for a Cerebral Palsy client
- Profuse bleeding stops even though client was on Coumadin (blood thinner)
- Shaking Off Negative Client Energies Between Sessions
- Adding EFT to conventional talk therapy
- EFT aids an "energy sensitive" client
- Criminal defense attorney uses EFT to help innocent client during cross-examination
- Conversations with Dr. Mercola -- Part 2 of 7
- EFT and Time Line Therapy helps 92 year old man live in the now
- How do I use EFT for the client who has many, many, many severe issues?
- Listening to this client's words led to a surprising core issue
- Dr. Patricia Carrington's use of "Choices" in the EFT Setup Phrase
- Rebecca Marina's 10 steps to building a prosperous EFT practice
- When The Client Wishes To Maintain Privacy
- An answer as to why some clients do not tap even when they know EFT will help them?
- Two successes where the client surrogate taps for other people--everyone benefits
- Tips to consider when you have had "incomplete success" with an EFT client
- Conversations with Dr. Mercola Part 3
- Do you attract clients that want everything for free?
- When should you consult an EFT Practitioner?
- The Apex Effect -- client cannot even remember the details of her former problem
- Kinetic tremor disappears as Turkish MD addresses client's emotional issues
- 7 Step pre-tapping checklist for client work
- When the client won't speak about the issue
- Helping clients by using "Meta Programs"
- EFT Successfully Collapses Childhood Beliefs About Food -- Client Stops Overeating
- Enhancing the life of Burak -- a Down Syndrome client
- Using EFT for the client who feels bad about herself
- 8 tips for building your EFT practice with email newsletters
- Conversations with Dr. Mercola -- Part 4 of 7
- EFT Clients!
- What Questions Should You Ask When Seeking An EFT Practitioner?
- Thoughts on following your EFT intuition with clients
- EFT from a CLIENT'S POINT OF VIEW
- Hair dresser helps client raise her arm - The salon clients cheered
- How to search for an EFT Practitioner
- The client who is "Never Good Enough" and The Brick Wall Technique
- Doing EFT for the client that is afraid to get started
- How this therapist uses Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and EFT together
- Conversations with Dr. Mercola -- Part 5 of 7
- Improving results with dissociated clients
- Core Issues
- When "insignificant" childhood events are the real core issues
- Getting To Feelings And Core Issues By Imagining You Are Writing A Story - A Version Of The EFT Tell The Story Technique
- An Impressive Search For EFT Core Issues -- Asking The Right Questions
- The "7 Whys" method for getting to core issues
- An extraordinary account of tapping on a prenatal core issue -- or how to change a life in moments
- In Search Of An Elusive EFT Core Issue
- Finding An EFT Core Issue -- "But What Did He Give You?"
- A self questioning method for getting to your core issues
- An excellent question to help find core issues
- Finding and Dealing with Core Events
- Barbara shares an insightful way to find core issues
- The core issue behind Carl's inability to "perform"
- Collapsing the core issues of procrastination with EFT
- A classic case for finding a core issue
- Finding core issues when someone is emotionally flat lining
- Using Tail Enders to find core issues
- A clever method for finding core issues
- Obsession with having affairs ends after finding the core issue
- Why Cathy didn't enjoy Christmas--an embarrassing core event
- Two examples where core issues show up during an EFT session
- A Useful Way To Find Core Issues In The EFT Process
- Ilana Weiler uses the 7 Whys method for getting to core issues
- MD resolves arm weakness problem by relieving an emotional core issue
- A clever way to find core issues
- A surprising core issue behind business call reluctance
- Using the Palace of Possibilities to uncover core issues
- The "Audio Technique" for getting to core issues
- Iris finds her own core issue
- Eliminating Hot Flashes With EFT Tapping -- Surprising Core Issues
- Tracing core issues back to the birth process
- Blending Redecision Therapy with EFT--a creative way to uncover core issues
- Easy and Effective EFT for Newcomers
- Newbie has great results with persistent hiccoughs!
- Borrowing Benefits newcomer details impressive success
- EFT Newcomer Helps Her Daughter Relieve Constipation
- Quality advice for EFT Newbies
- How watching the EFT DVDs helped a nausea case
- EFT newbie successfully surrogates for her dying plant
- A newbie with 6 rounds of EFT eliminates her bladder infection pain
- A newbie dropped pounds at a time she usually gained
- Two Newcomer EFT Tapping Successes: Fainting And Shyness
- Newbie quiets her daughter
- Relative Newbie's First Major Tapping Toe Stub - Foot Pain Issue
- Doing EFT for a newcomer without having to explain it
- Using EFT
- A guy thing: Tips on using EFT for male ED
- Using EFT for Tachycardia
- Using EFT for Chemotherapy symptoms
- An encouraging example of using EFT for Crohn's Disease
- Using EFT for an ailing pony
- Using EFT for wrinkles - An alternative to Botox?
- Using EFT to overcome the resistance to exercise
- Using EFT while you are in an argument
- Using EFT for Chronic Problems
- Heaviness in both legs disappears after using EFT on "These Growing Pains"
- Some thoughts on using EFT for personal peace
- Using EFT for the Holidays
- Using EFT for Poison Ivy
- Using EFT over the phone for on-the-spot issues
- Thoughts on using EFT for procrastination
- Using EFT for "Everything is my fault!"
- Using EFT to Create
- Success by using EFT while reading our Newsletter articles
- A subtle, yet powerful self-image benefit from using EFT
- Suggestions for using EFT with a Mother
- Using EFT for Alzheimer's disease
- Many benefits in 3 months using EFT's Personal Peace Procedure
- Using EFT for Muscular Dystrophy
- Some tips when using EFT by yourself
- Using EFT to bring up core memories
- Using EFT for Herpes
- Using EFT on Asperger
- How to Handle Self Sabotage by Using EFT
- Using EFT from pre-birth to the present
- Using EFT to enhance persuasion skills
- Using EFT with our "internal parents"
- Using EFT for spiritual issues
- Using EFT for motivation to exercise
- Using EFT to avoid tears while chopping onions
- Using EFT to reclaim our personal power
- Using EFT for inanimate objects may point to your own issues
- Using EFT to avert an amputation
- A method for using EFT regarding the "difficult people" in your life.
- Using EFT to relieve a cold sore (Herpes HSV-1)
- Using EFT to learn foreign language pronunciation
- Specific couple techniques using EFT
- Using EFT for Jet Lag--even with 4 time changes
- Using EFT to manifest your goal more easily
- Using EFT with a Skeptic
- Using EFT for Premature Ejaculation
- Using EFT with computers, web-cameras and microphones
- Using EFT to cut "energetic cords" of attachment to people
- Using EFT for Goal Setting
- Using EFT to bring us back into balance during challenging situations
- Using EFT for a clogged ear
- Follow up on "Using EFT to avert an amputation"
- Using EFT for Trigeminal Neuralgia
- Using EFT for changing habits and more
- Using EFT in singing lessons
- Using EFT to Enhance Bedroom Romance
- Using EFT to find (and collapse) a limiting belief
- Using EFT for mother issues
- Using EFT for Plantar Fasciitis
- Using EFT with a Survivor of Domestic Violence
- Using EFT to better enjoy certain foods and expand sensory experience
- Using EFT for forgiveness
- Using EFT with A Course in Miracles teachings
- Using EFT for racial prejudice
- Lifelong car sickness disappears--but only after using EFT on the real issue
- Using EFT to regain Laurence's sense of taste.
- Big benefits from using EFT on an "irrelevant memory"
- Tips and strategies for using EFT with Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD)
- Using EFT to reduce our judgment of others
- Using EFT in the Emergency Room: Raging bladder infection subsides
- Q & A Series on using EFT
- Using EFT to start the day
- Passing a driving test using EFT - a case with many aspects
- Using EFT for your Biggest Problem
- Ideas for those using EFT to further their own personal development
- Using EFT on imaginary parts
- Classic case of using EFT for the child within
- Using EFT for Dreamwork
- Using EFT for Marathon Training and difficult things to do
- Using EFT when a specific word triggers you
- Using EFT to support the In Vitro Fertilization (IVF) process
- Using EFT for Self-Doubt
- Using EFT to say Good-Bye to a dying person
- Using EFT to release "the decision to be miserable"
- Using EFT for the Inner Child
- Using EFT with a dementia patient: A touching story
- Using EFT over the phone
- Using EFT for bothersome noises
- Using EFT to easily learn another language
- Benefits of using EFT in a cardiac group
- Tapping on TREEs -- a metaphor for using EFT
- Using EFT for the "Grey Life Syndrome"
- Using EFT to resolve issues in your dreams
- Using EFT with massage
- Using EFT within a unique form of meditation
- Using EFT for a stroke and other issues -- In praise of the 9-gamut procedure
- Using EFT to eliminate recurring dreams
- Using EFT for Self-Confidence in a specific area
- Using EFT for overcoming procrastination
- Personal Pleasure Procedure - Using EFT to improve your romantic life
- Using EFT for a double ankle sprain
- Using EFT for Abundance releases limiting beliefs
- Using EFT to rejuvenate a withered plant
- Using EFT for Procrastination
- Marielle discovers a lifetime core issue while using EFT for a bad cough
- Using EFT for the side effects of Medications
- Using EFT for feeling like a failure
- Using EFT for cerebral palsy
- Using EFT for emphysema
- Using EFT to build emotional strength in overwhelming circumstances
- Using EFT for Menopause, Hot flashes and Chills
- Using EFT for Scleroderma
- Using EFT for preventing illness
- Using EFT for our illiterate and semi-literate brothers and sisters
- Using EFT for struggling students with ADD
- Using EFT to Trade the Market
- A successful case of using EFT for candida yeast infections
- Persistence worked when using EFT at the first signs of a cold
- Using EFT to advance your business
- Using EFT for world crises
- Using EFT for clearing poltergeist energy
- After using EFT, Paul's 84 year old mum recovered very quickly from a surgical operation
- Using EFT for a choking emergency
- Using EFT to neutralize "family differences"
- Using EFT to release the pain of saying goodbye
- Using EFT for clearing clutter and organizing your life
- Using EFT to increase blood platelet count--an article with far reaching implications
- Using EFT for old and frail people
- Easy stress reducer using EFT with statements like, "The world is conspiring in my favor"
- 11 year old girl finds lost cell phone using EFT
- Many benefits from watching our EFT-Beyond the Basics DVDs
- Technical evidence of the link between emotional causes and physical ailments
- Borrowing Benefits and an Acute Respiratory Disorder
- Attracting Abundance by Shifting Your Energy
- Finding the root of the problem
- Thoughts on dealing with corporations
- MD provides secretary with "The Incredible Shrinking Hemorrhoids"
- Lindsay Kenny answers Frequently Asked Questions about EFT
- About Voice Technology...
- EFT and sex
- A "Hard to Swallow" case
- Healing the "Missing Mother Syndrome" with EFT
- Borrowing Benefits from Sacramento to the United Kingdom
- Quadriplegic feels "bubbles" during EFT session
- When you are in traffic and REALLY have to pee....
- Knocking down the negative walls to let the garden grow - a tale of fertility
- Using movies to enhance and test our work.
- When Your Intensity Level Goes UP Instead Of Down With EFT
- Combining EFT with Timelines
- 10 minutes of EFT put 10 years of Restless Leg Syndrome (RLS) to rest
- EFT stops a blood blister from forming
- Taking the edge off intense emotions--Putting them in a box and tapping on them
- Tapping with good photos and bad photos
- Improving the ability to laugh with EFT
- A tapping song
- EFT on autopilot
- EFT resolves limiting childhood beliefs
- Medical transcriptionist says that in thousands of serious medical cases, she never saw a cure for anyone
- A short woman no longer feels intimidated around tall people after one EFT session
- Tapping along with a prayer
- Rapid Relief for Herpes
- Peak Performance Series
- A solid "Doing Business with EFT" idea from Rebecca Marina
- Emphatic EFT dramatically shifts many things--use this on stubborn issues
- EFT for eliminating barriers to our psychic abilities (and intuition)
- Using onomatopoeias with EFT
- Roxy gets multiple "Bedroom O's" with EFT
- EFT for severe cerebral palsy
- Rue Hass blends EFT with the wisdom of
- A woman with scoliosis finds balance with EFT - follow-up included
- EFT and Ho'oponopono
- Blood improves after a few minutes of EFT
- Thoughts on mental tapping and reframing
- Tapping back your sense of taste when you have a cold or flu
- Feeling and observing emotions
- EFT engages inner child to relieve indigestion (dyspepsia).
- Eric no longer hears voices
- EFT assists Polio patient
- EFT for eliminating hiccups changes a skeptic
- EFT eases nausea
- EFT is helpful when you are afraid to speak up in bed
- How racism can lead to health problems and what to do about it
- EFT helps a Premature Ejaculation (PE) problem
- Laura Orchard uses EFT during a dream
- Bedroom frustration resolved - including follow-ups
- Suzanne Lerner gives her thoughts on diagnosis
- Building confidence and releasing the inner critic
- Nothing in my traditional medical training in Anatomy, Physiology or Pathology even hinted at what I am now witnessing (with EFT) - Chuck Gebhardt, MD
- More successful cases from Dr. Eric Robins
- Can EFT tele-classes cause problems for some participants?
- EFT approaches for "Loose Ligaments" that can apply to countless other issues
- Asking good questions to elicit tappable issues
- EFT for elderly people who stuff their feelings
- EFT with hypnosis provides long term benefits for abandonment issue
- Have you noticed the important feedback you get while doing EFT?
- Leslie Anne Lackman successfully uses humor and takes aim at neuropeptides
- EFT for disliking someone shifts resentments to acceptance -- a major result
- Combining EFT with Dialoguing for impressive results
- Did Karen
- EFT for those who grind their teeth
- Healing the wounded Inner Child with EFT
- EFT after a horrible nightmare
- 25 Ways to be a Fantastic Therapist
- Tuning in to the problem
- EFT in Daily Life
- Cold Calling: "I'm a second-class citizen, and I have to keep my mouth shut!"
- It is your response that counts.
- Improve your success rate by asking the right questions
- Interview with Gary regarding EFT and yeast problems
- I simply could not dance with Gary!!
- This is simply priceless to a mother of a 16 year old
- A Useful Method for "Private Tapping"
- Why do we sometimes avoid tapping?
- Resolving emotional causes for erectile dysfunction
- EFT substantially aids swallowing problem
- Methods for working with pain
- Borrowing Benefits for a seemingly unrelated issue
- Questions on PR as well as possible dangers. (Other responses follow)
- A Conversation With Your Body
- EFT provides benefits using Future Tapping
- A New Moment in Science -- useful EFT article for distribution
- What the Bleep do We Know about EFT?
- Curse words aid the clearing of emotional issues
- The Human Brain and Law of Attraction: Optimizing Brain Function with EFT
- Try a motivational Power Hour to improve your business
- Let it be easy
- Banishing the Barriers to having a thriving EFT business
- How to handle emotions about the cheating spouse
- Cascade tapping
- EFT turned Masha into a runner - an interesting side effect
- 200 people watch as EFT improves Range of Motion for a Nurse's arm
- Blending NLP with EFT
- More thoughts about stopping colds with EFT
- An MD successfully uses EFT on a Hiatal Hernia and Candidiasis
- Technical article: Influencing peptides with EFT
- Can You Influence Another Person To Use EFT If They Are Reluctant To Do So?
- EFT for faulty beliefs
- EFT and Reframing using Counter-Examples
- What do you do for friends who incessantly bend your ear while venting their problems?
- EFT for people who go blank when asked to speak
- EFT for sciatica and a 6 year old wounded thumb
- EFT helps a young musician stop shaking
- Tapping with a poem as inspiration
- EFT helps a boy who has many health challenges
- Barb St. Dennis had severe Hepatitis C but now has completely normal blood tests
- Using a metaphor to handle stubborn emotional issues
- Treating negative beliefs with EFT
- Who do YOU think you are?
- An EFT method for installing new behaviors
- Two ways to use EFT for Restless Leg Syndrome
- Did EFT cure Lupus?
- Insights on Borrowing Benefits with EFT
- Hearing the energy shift while doing EFT
- A clever combination of tapping and visualization
- Introducing EFT to kids by way of their "magic fingers"
- EFT for Celiac disease -- no symptoms for 4 months and counting
- EFT and "being the bee"
- EFT helps a serious infection - the redness subsides before their eyes
- EFT for the mental game of poker
- Methods for getting to deep issues, even in a group setting
- Using silent tapping in cases where speaking out loud is too loony
- Taking "The Secret" for a walk with EFT
- Removing the blocks to your goals with EFT
- Manifesting the life of your dreams with EFT
- Can EFT be used to manifest what you want in your life?
- Inner Child Expert uses EFT for her own healing
- Symptoms quickly fade for a child with a Bi-Polar Diagnosis
- The "Gratitude for My Mistakes" method
- Professional writer uses EFT to overcome writer's block
- EFT helps a bullied woman stay at her job
- Talking to Christians About EFT
- Warming up to "cold calls" with EFT
- An interesting way to do EFT in a group
- EFT for discomfort with networking - an interesting solution
- The Value of Matching and Pacing Belief Systems in Group Training
- Do you have difficulty receiving positive feelings from others?
- A Useful Series on Borrowiing Benefits
- EFT methods: Questions, One-Point-EFT and Mental EFT
- Tapping via typing--email sessions
- The Vibration of Abundance
- MD uses EFT for common colds and canker sores
- Rhythm, Pulse & Percussion In Tapping Treatments
- A clever "Chasing the Pain" case
- Acupuncturist gives his view of EFT and Classical Chinese Medical Aspects
- Thoughts on EFT and Intention
- EFT methods for "Smokers Lung" that apply to most chronic conditions
- Can EFT fix a computer?
- Feeling woosy from Alcohol
- Erica gets a complete overhaul through EFT
- A common sense procedure for getting EFT results
- Expanding Your Comfort Zones: The key to your success
- Ten minutes of EFT restores healthy performance in the bedroom - eliminates the need for the little blue pill
- Resolving nightmares...and more
- Aiming EFT at the FUTURE
- A journey through an important piece of our "newthink."
- Addressing the "Why Bother?" syndrome
- Creating a happy future
- How to have a happy day
- An experiment on how EFT statements affect our bodies
- Three possible reframes for people struggling with sadness
- Did Erika
- Tap while listening to music that makes you cry
- EFT helps calm an autistic boy after he accidentally hurt his mother
- Untangling two events with EFT leads to business freedom
- Louise's skeptical dad warmed up to EFT
- Tapping for the United Nations
- EFT helps with repulsed feelings about unwanted advances
- 3 Items and some Holiday advice
- Phobia relief on TV in the UK
- EFT appears favorably in a German TV sitcom
- Gwyneth Moss discusses Support for Therapists
- Collapsing a lifelong belief that her mother had tried to harm her in the womb
- How do you do EFT to fit a time slot?
- Clearing clutter for clarity and confidence
- "God Tapping"
- Loving your feminine body
- Having trouble "letting go" in the bedroom
- Getting EFT Blocks and Barriers out of the way - a list of questions
- EFT fixes car to pass inspection
- Ted Robinson's tips for doing Borrowing Benefits groups
- Visualizing and tapping on limiting beliefs
- Ann Adams on getting EFT accepted by Institutions
- Eliminating shingles pain in 1/2 hour
- Why People Sometimes Have Negative Feelings After Doing EFT
- Tapping while traveling can improve your mood
- EFT calms elderly woman
- For the skeptics--Is EFT a placebo?
- Marie's "molestation secret"
- Persistent EFT helps with unnecessary worry and a feeling of always being responsible -- many side issues collapse as well
- A very useful method for getting to important issues
- EFT for an aversion to stuff that disgusts you
- Karen helped her father recover the use of his fingers after a stroke
- EFT for feeling overly responsible
- Tell your friends, there is, at last, a cure for the common cold!
- Positively adjusting the perceptions of others with EFT
- A clever combo of EFT and Essences
- Paralysis finally overcome after everything else failed
- An important case on aspects--Martin's learning challenge
- EFT relieves "incurable" Restless Leg Syndrome (RLS)
- How a physician uses EFT
- EFT for Boredom and Loneliness
- Low Libido is not always as simple as it appears
- Facial paralysis clears in one
- EFT for the complexities of a single, dating life
- Dawson Church successfully applies EFT for his episode of gout
- Persistent, quality EFT adds 5 inches to Gillian's bust line
- Taking EFT into the Corporate Market
- Did EFT keep Wayne from getting more grey hair?
- EFT helps relieve blushing
- Quickie pain relief--A "one point wonder".
- Helping mother and her unborn baby with EFT
- Daily EFT creates calm under explosive family circumstances
- EFT assists conception
- Using Role Playing With EFT
- MD uses EFT for a demented woman
- Gayle Waxon learns to stop her own epileptic seizures with EFT
- Does language matter when doing EFT?
- Using the term "somehow..." within the EFT process
- Blending EFT with Homeopathy
- A quality look at "The Apex Effect"
- Psychiatrist relieves sexual exhibitionism with EFT--4 year follow-up
- Tap and be rich
- EFT for resistance to doing EFT
- "I have to lie constantly to live my life as I know it"
- Further bridges to our history
- Stress and Me and EFT
- Gratitude and Coach Ben Hammerschmidt
- EFT and Nightmares
- A successful use of EFT for Hasimoto
- Five extreme behavior patterns related to organizing and how to address them with EFT
- Your Vibration Always Comes First
- EFT and future pacing
- EFT for people who are sensitive
- EFT for painful cramping
- WHO AM I NOW??? How Identity Issues Block Abundance
- Kelly Meisak uses a unique approach for her ADD prone brother
- This lady had not been out of her house for two years because she suffered from chronic burping
- Reiki Master uses EFT in the Republic of Mauritius
- Creating a remarkable bridge to our former history
- Here's a textbook EFT case for using persistence, reframes, chasing the pain, metaphors and creative language
- Carol Look Shows us How to Release Procrastination with EFT
- Helpful hints for the Holidays.
- EFT and visible changes in physical appearance
- EFT assists young boy in taking his Ringworm medicine
- EFT works for cellulitis on 3 separate occasions
- Connecting to our Birthright of Fertility
- How to tap into the
- Tapping for being "able, willing and worthy" may help boost EFT results
- Creating positive affirmations with EFT and your senses
- EFT for painful menopause symptoms
- An interesting EFT approach for getting beyond "glass ceilings"
- EFT using teddy bears
- Victoria's 10-day EFT blood pressure experiment results
- EFT and The Law of Attraction - A Perfect Match
- Tapping with tunes
- Do you have emotional difficulty with the standard EFT phrasing?
- Jewels in the junkyard--the prison population
- EFT improves a mentally disabled young man
- Can You Do EFT With Eyes Closed?
- Not finding the right words for EFT is a block that can be overcome
- High blood pressure recedes - and remains normal a week later
- Deborah Miller beautifully reframes an assault issue into a new personal identity
- The many benefits of EFT circles--and how to do them
- Why does tapping on the side of the hand work?
- EFT for a numb face and tongue - instant relief for a skeptic
- Suzanne Zacharia finds the root causes of Multiple Chemical Sensitivity (MCS)
- EFT to help heal fruit trees - a major new business waiting to happen?
- Mental Dental EFT - for the dentist and the patient
- Sneaking Up On The Problem When You Do EFT
- EFT enhances many things
- EFT for bladder control when on the road
- Silent Night Sadness -- when certain music gives you the blues
- Mary Pellicer, MD, on Intuitive Diagnosis
- EFT provides instant relief for Poison Ivy itching
- Quieting down an elderly stroke victim in a nursing home
- Three Keys to EFT Mastery
- Painful mastitis clears after EFT
- How to get non-profit organizations to host EFT group meetings--and pay you as well
- A creative approach to psychological reversal
- EFT as a morning eye-opener
- EFT for night time trips to the bathroom--including follow-up
- Teresa Knezek treats her own Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) -- including a 3 year followup
- Raising your metabolism with EFT
- When EFT gives only temporary results
- Katie's posture and her many emotional issues
- When conflicting beliefs keep us stuck
- Rehana Webster teaches the details behind a successful blushing case
- Resentment gets in the way of abundance
- Changing a man's life with EFT--including pain, emotions and bedroom romance
- EFT in the snow -- creating comfort in the cold
- Stopping the flu in its early stages
- "How do I get really good at EFT?"
- Relief for Bashful Bladder
- When Positive is Negative - Accepting Your Light
- Tapping through a beginning seizure
- EFT for addressing what happened in your day -- use it daily for solid long term benefits
- EFT for economic stress -- using "I prefer peace"
- A Psychologist in India uses EFT for suicide intervention
- Demonstrating EFT to a mental health support team
- How to remember your dreams with EFT
- New Uses for EFT
- EFT helps alleviate several issues associated with infidelity
- Using Galvanic Skin Response to validate EFT
- NLP procedures enhance anyone's delivery of EFT
- "Helpless to get what I want" - Using intuition to get at important issues
- MD writes article on Emotions, Energy, and Healing
- Tapping on "what didn
- An aneurism left a man's hand shaking, unable to write for 12 years.
- How to use EFT with your dreams to collapse important emotional issues
- Resolving two bothersome tics with EFT
- Saying "goodbye" with the
- An at risk coronary patient has normal arteries and flawless angiogram after persistent EFT for two months
- Tapping while responding to a nasty comment from the past
- EFT for looking forward instead of backwards
- How Do You Know You Are Benefiting From EFT Much As You Can?
- EFT and the taming of the tongue
- Gwyneth Moss on The Importance of Rehearsal in an EFT session
- How do you feel ABOUT your body having pain?
- Was this a negative reaction to EFT?
- Many benefits from tapping on a prayer
- Future tapping to get what you want
- How to get EFT into Schools
- EFT collapses seasickness and Rosa becomes the life of the party
- What is your body trying to tell you?
- An extraordinary example of the real power of EFT's Borrowing Benefits procedure -- a bridge phobia disappears "behind the scenes"
- EFT for past life issues
- EFT for Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD) and a host of other issues
- Prenatal EFT improves hemoglobin count with before and after test
- Getting to the real reason behind Janet's "bedroom inhibitions"
- Tapping on gratitude for EFT
- After EFT, Kay
- A procedure for dealing with the resistance to heal
- To Lead or Not to Lead...
- Looking waaay in the past for the cause of a physical symptom
- Overcoming a lifelong fruit revulsion and some side benefits
- One person
- EFT is effective despite language barriers
- Shingle symptoms gone in just two EFT sessions
- Two examples where working on one issue provides relief for another
- Important EFT topic: Doing the best we can
- Useful thoughts on integrating EFT within the military
- Eckhart Tolle
- Daily uses of EFT with A Course in Miracles (ACIM)
- EFT for helping a mother bond with her child
- How EFT unclogged my toilet
- The Inner Committee
- Can we affect inanimate objects better with EFT? - Rebecca's engine light
- A humorous reply to an EFT skeptic
- EFT enhances math scores
- Praise for EFT from a Buddhist Monk
- EFT calms an autistic boy in school
- Cognitive Shifts (Belief Changes) That Work
- EFT: The Gift to Unwrap and Use before the Holidays!
- Another successful hiccoughs (hiccups) case
- Did EFT help relieve menopause symptoms?
- Borrowing Benefits gets impressive results on TV
- Re-evaluating the Apex problem
- Handling vertigo symptoms over the phone
- Food stuck in the throat goes down easily after EFT
- In Praise of Continual Tapping
- Scientific evolution of EFT from TFT
- Does EFT compete with God?
- How to Get Into Businesses and Organizations By Getting Welcomed Through the Back Door
- EFT on the move -- for busy people
- EFT for Speech Loss following a Stroke
- Discovering the cause of humming in the ears
- EFT's Borrowing Benefits collapses 36 issues in 2.5 hours
- Problems that are difficult to assess in the here and now. (Several responses follow)
- A tapping tip to lighten the load
- Did Mary
- Calming effects of EFT during an emergency on an airplane
- EFT brings benefits for leaky gut syndrome and ASD (a form of autism)
- EFT clears nausea - but not in the expected way
- Stronger orgasms with EFT
- Persistence and EFT homework help a woman embrace her femininity
- A quality use of our Borrowing Benefits DVDs
- Some thoughts on secondary gains - and what to do about them
- Including the word
- EFT improves hearing by 25%
- Successful EFT without knowing the details
- Psychiatrist gets to the real reason his patient couldn't say "NO"
- An EFT Meditation
- Critical Questioning While Doing EFT
- MD uses EFT to treat Sjogren
- Many successes doing
- Jo Huntsman takes EFT into her own hands and has success with Lupus like symptoms
- A metaphor for introducing EFT
- EFT in a plane for scary facial paralysis - a doctor on board said it was Bell
- EFT enhances the "Artist's Way" work
- Do we need to heal the past so that we can move into the future?
- Are you getting the most out of EFT?
- The benefits of tapping along with our DVDs--core memories uncovered
- Allowing EFT to come THROUGH you rather than BY you
- How to know when the healing is done
- Clearing past issues from the walls of our mind
- The ABC approach to EFT
- Ideas for winding up EFT sessions
- Metaphors, Humour and EFT
- Use EFT when you are afraid to speak up
- Success via tapping on a two-sided conflict
- Validating EFT with Neurofeedback
- Did EFT clear a 90% blocked artery?
- After 9 years suffering with polycystic ovary syndrome, Jenn finds relief with EFT
- EFT for forgetting lines in a school play
- EFT for calming while being strapped down on a hospital gurney
- Acupuncturist uses EFT and eliminates her own shingles in three days
- For those who have difficulty telling left from right
- Marketing EFT as a business--Cultivating important Centers of Influence (COI)
- Learning, intelligence and "emotional static"
- Psychiatric Nurse gives pointers for dealing with severe emotional disorders
- Thoughts on an emergency tapping point
- The value of taking dead aim at the negatives
- Circumcision at the root of writer's block
- The Salesman who didn't want to cold call
- Try EFT on everything--even an oncoming fainting spell
- EFT helps an 8 year old with a concussion
- Am I a failure at EFT if there is no miracle?
- Surprising insights than can occur while tapping
- Healing families with EFT - a historical approach
- A physicist speaks
- Why couldn't Jason make a simple decision?
- A New Way to Express Gratitude with EFT
- Resolving many impediments to a satisfactory "bedroom experience"
- Sometimes slowing down EFT can provide quality benefits
- MD uses EFT to clear many issues in 15 minutes
- A simple way to handle Shingles -- no drugs involved
- EFT for severe MSG reaction
- Finding the real issues behind what appeared to be a "Bedroom Romance" problem
- Clever use of EFT clears issues for baby, mother and grandmother - follow-up included
- Breaking habits
- Relaxing a dying man
- We are babes crawling on the floor of the Universe
- Susan de Tarr eliminates her 54 year old motion sickness in 10 minutes
- How to convince an entire audience about EFT
- Psychiatrist relieves sexual exhibitionism with EFT--4 year follow-up
- Emotion and Perception: EFT makes it a two way street
- EFT on an inanimate object: The car that wouldn't start
- Combining EFT with Humor
- EFT helps remove "stuck ring"
- Key Concepts in Mastering EFT
- Borrowing Benefits in the Criminal Justice System
- The "proper words" to use for the EFT Set-up Statement
- Borrowing Benefits hastens the healing of mystery thumb sores
- Brain dumping with EFT to get started on global issues
- EFT helps salesman double his sales
- An EFT Procrastination case
- From a 38 B to a 38 D/DD while losing 20 pounds
- Thoughts on Psychological Reversal from Rue Hass -- with an ADD example
- Gratitude tapping
- EFT in Kenya
- Are you suppressing your EFT talents?
- EFT as a cure for boredom
- Improving intimate moments with EFT
- Dispersing 50 years worth of suppressed emotion
- A brief heat exhaustion case
- Messages from an oven
- How Dawn Norton used EFT to collapse her own "horror" issue
- Five-for-one benefits from an introductory EFT group
- Making EFT a routine
- Using "Inner Dialogues" with EFT
- EFT relieves an unusual
- How I grew my bustline with EFT
- An 8 year old boy with very strange eating habits finds a new menu with EFT
- Jeff Lipnick uses EFT to keep from blacking out
- EFT, ED and related bedroom issues
- Daily tapping lowers blood sugar
- Borrowing Benefits while watching The EFT Course
- Who do YOU think you are?
- Headache relief over the phone
- Claude improves his fishing
- Using humor with EFT
- How to handle a "vague feeling" with EFT
- Eight Easy Ways to Remember to Do EFT
- Tapping to improve your intuition
- The acute sinusitis case that wouldn't budge until....
- It's never too late to clear useless childhood beliefs
- EFT for the emotional aspects of a Cesarean Section
- Ten steps to changing your limiting responses to a falling economy
- EFT for stammering
- Dr. Barr used EFT after cutting off the tip of his thumb
- Judi thinks that doing EFT for others helped her - winning in Las Vegas
- Borrowing Benefits with EFT improves communication at a committee meeting
- Thoughts about inheriting illness from our ancestors
- Twelve years of facial numbness eliminated with 2 rounds of EFT
- A Lesson in EFT Intuition--Letting it flow through you
- EFT brings relief for ALS
- How to tell others about EFT
- Some thoughts on when to use "I choose" vs. "I prefer"
- EFT for changing entrenched habits
- Experts point to dramatic changes in brain waves as a result of EFT
- Continuous tapping resolves an intense abreaction
- Did 20 minutes of EFT straighten bones that had knitted improperly 50 years before?
- EFT and the right to be happy
- EFT for feeling unqualified to be successful
- EFT relieves a case of the Hiccups
- EFT for facing those who caused you pain
- Did EFT bring this man out of a coma?
- "It was impossible for the testicle to descend on its own."
- The Merits of Daily Tapping
- Is it safe to change?
- Processing your life's key words with EFT
- How do I introduce EFT to skeptics? (Building Bridges to Believability)
- Why do people resist EFT?
- What would happen if this problem wasn't there any more?
- Wisdom from Mair Llewellyn regarding the "Writing on our Walls"
- Incorporating EFT into Corporate Programs
- EFT -- a quality aid for Shingles
- Strong correlation found between EFT and Dr. Emoto's work with water
- EFT and The Power of Reframing
- EFT and insights (cognitive change)
- Giving more meaning to the 0-10 intensity rating
- MD Applies EFT to Successfully Relieve Urethral Pain
- Borrowing Benefits: My Jury has returned with a verdict
- How to Identify and Correct Psychological Reversals
- Dr. Carol Look's Top 10 Tapping Tips
- More on EFT and Reframing by Tania Prince
- Consistent and Impressive results from EFT group work
- Gordon was in a psychiatric hospital for two years and was released two weeks after one EFT session
- How feelings in the body are related to emotional clearing
- EFT for the Inner Child
- EFT for food poisoning
- Two cases of doing EFT in public without looking silly
- Improving romantic openness and enjoyment with EFT
- EFT for Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) - "You can't make me!"
- EFT brings beauty to a hospice setting
- EFT collapses competing thoughts and thus aids The Law of Attraction
- How to transform disappointment into gratitude
- EFT Question Tapping
- Helping a 97 year old man to die peacefully
- Successful EFT phone work makes major shifts for overwhelmed mother
- Thoughts on resolving difficult physical problems
- A unique way to expand EFT
- EFT removes a pesky "phantom itch"
- Tips for conducting intensive EFT sessions -- a several day case regarding Bulimia
- Create acceptance of your life with EFT
- Clearing a food aversion in 5 minutes
- What would appear to be the main issue may not be so
- How long should the flu last?
- EFT for making your voice stronger
- A new kind of mosquito relief?
- Try fork bending with EFT
- A clever approach to finding core memories
- An adventure within the Palace of Possibilities
- Injured toe gains relief using two important EFT concepts
- Sarah Jordan makes progress after realizing a childhood need
- Aiming EFT at our Future
- What to do when the "Bedroom Spark" goes out
- Tap on experiences that are stuck in parts of your body
- The young woman who kept quitting her jobs
- How to create empowering reframes (seeing things differently) with EFT
- Praise for tapping along with the EFT DVDs
- EFT for a spider (and mosquito) bite
- EFT helps Elaine learn the clarinet at 50
- Two stories to create a bridge between your audience and EFT
- Two cases: Putting on needed pounds with EFT & Holding water for an ultrasound
- Mom doing EFT for autistic son yields enormous changes in one month
- A touching story about Michael, his ailing aunt and EFT
- Letting intuition flow with EFT
- A lesson in "letting go"
- Can we learn to be grateful no matter what?
- Improve your EFT sessions by waking up your senses
- Severe lung congestion clears with persistent daily EFT
- Was prostate cancer really the cause of Sam's Low Libido?
- EFT for the Sensitive Person -- Awakening the Wild Pony Within
- EFT helps release nervousness before an important meeting
- Impressive results with autism
- Releasing chaotic behavior through EFT
- EFT hat dance
- Deserving to live -- an intense memory resolved
- EFT helps with hair loss, facial blemishes, hay fever, smoking and PMS
- Expert gives us an inside look at Group EFT
- Baerbel Borrows Benefits in her own EFT group and dissolves her creative blocks
- When EFT Doesn't Seem to Work
- Motion sickness averted through "Chasing the Pain."
- Being Specific
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Articles & Ideas
Dr. Patricia Carrington's use of "Choices" in the EFT Setup Phrase
Important Note: This article was written prior to 2010 and is now outdated. Please use my newest advancement, Optimal EFT. It is more efficient, more powerful and clearly explained in my free e-book, The Unseen Therapist™. Best wishes, Gary
Celebrities appear to have it all--money, fame, power and the ability to wave their hands and have the world bend to their every whim. That may be so, at least from an outsider's perspective, but their inner worlds are just as prone to frailties as yours and mine.
Dr. Patricia Carrington takes us on a unique tour inside a celebrity client of hers and develops not only several useful insights for us but also suggests a "choices" version of affirmations.
Frequently, if a client has been cleared of a block by using EFT the problem may be gone forever, or only require a few "booster" tapping sessions at home before the treatment really 'takes'.
But what of the issues which, having been successfully tapped on, still need to be assimilated into a person's life pattern to have their greatest effect? The way a person has lived their life up until now - their self-image and habitual ways of being -- can work against even the most beneficial changes, and although they may not wipe out the gains made, they can make these gains less pervasive and influential. In this event we will not have gotten everything we could out of that stunning switch in perspective that can occur with EFT.
Here is where the use of "Choices" (a form of affirmation which I find more effective in many instances than the straight declarative form) comes in. I 've found that the "Choices" method can assist a client to consolidate and make permanent the beneficial changes brought about by EFT, thus helping these EFT-created changes to generalize to many aspects of the person's life. When that happens, we see true transformation.
Let me give you an example.
"Tara" came into therapy for help with intermittent depression and marital problems. She is an accomplished singer who grew up in a world of theatre people. Her mother played a regular bit part on a TV series, her father was a well-known TV director. Their friends were all show biz people.
An only child, Tara recalls that she was always dressed up in "adorable" clothes with an ever-different colored bow in her soft blonde curls. She would often recite Longfellow poems and do a little tap dance at age 3 to excited rounds of applause from their guests, which of course was the highest form of compliment from show people. At superficial glance one might conclude that she was "over-valued" since her every move was subjected to exaggerated attention (either praise or criticism), and her mother professed incredible pride and seemed to glory in her daughter's achievements, never missing a detail of one of her recitals. In fact, the mother seemed almost to have lived vicariously through her daughter, enjoying a triumph that she had never achieved in her own modest career.
When Tara came into therapy she acted as though she had "no identity" of her own, and this became a main focus for her treatment. In her year and a half of therapy we have made heavy use of EFT, with many sessions of tapping on her original family situation, on her fear of being more successful than her pretty actress mother, on her fear of failing to please her "highly directive" director father, and on the depression she feels today when she isn't getting what she considers enough attention (no applause in other words) from others.
During this time, Tara has changed remarkably. She now walks with dignity where before she seemed to flutter into a room. She now speaks more slowly and with a new sincerity and directness that make her come across as a "real person" to others for the first time. Her life in general, and her relationships have become much more real and very much richer. It often seems as though I am greeting a different person when she walks into the office.
Despite all these gains, however, she still had a residual sadness in her face, the look of a person gazing at some far away painful scene
When she came for a session recently, her sadness had come to the surface (which was good because now we could deal with it directly), and as we tapped on the sadness, it became evident that it was not due to anything in the present, nor was it about her being forced in childhood to uphold a facade for their guests -- none of that. In fact, it was not about attention per se -- rather it was about being in people's awareness, having them AWARE of her.
In the middle of this session, Tara's eyes lowered, and she became silent. Then she said in a low voice: "It's not about my worry about pleasing people anymore -- that's doesn't bother me the way it did. It's just that, attention or no attention, , and no matter how much she SAID she loved me, and no matter how much she boasted about me -- my mother wasn't really AWARE of ME." Her eyes welled up with tears as she spoke about this, and she explained that even when she had performed beautifully, and tap-danced and sung and recited the way her parents wanted her to, that she now realized that her mother never really saw the real "her".
"She saw the little puppet she'd created. She was so proud of that puppet, but she never saw ME...." She said. Here was a source of some of the deepest sadness within Tara -- and we were able, gently and with respect for the difficulty it was for her to articulate this, to dissipate this painful memory through quietly tapping on it:
"...even though Mommy never really saw me"...
"...even though Mommy didn't know I was there...",
"...even though her eyes didn't really look at me..."
As she tapped away, a quiet came over Tara, a peace I hadn't seen there before.
There was a new clarity in her eye as she said very slowly, "I never -- really -- realized this before. She saw the performer. She loved her. She never saw me. ... " . She then said that she had a peaceful feeling about this and that it was a tremendous relief to have faced it and been able to tap right on it, not on issues "around it". It was clear that this was a turning point for Tara.
I knew how fundamental the session had been and I wanted to help her consolidate her gain, to allow this insight and understanding to become a basis for her life from now on. To help this along, I suggested that we make a few "Choices" relating to what she had discovered. She was familiar with making Choices since we'd used them a number of times during her therapy. So she worked with me to create several to take home with her.
These choices evolved from a discussion which she and I then had about how we can "see" and respect ourselves even though someone as vital in our life as a parent may not have been truly aware of us as a child. Our discussion led to Tara realizing that her mother had not seen "her" (but only the little budding stage star) because the mother had never seen herself as real, but only as a would-be "star." None of this was because because she didn't love Tara. Love had nothing to do with it. It was her mother's sense of insignificance that was the factor operating here.
This was a time of deep understanding for Tara, a melting of a resentment she had carried around against her mother for years. She realized now that the two of them had both been caught in the same dilemma--that both had felt they were nonentities.
Several Choices (which Tara took home with her to work on) came out of this session, each dealing with a slightly different aspect of the problem and stating her preferred solution for it. These were worded as follows:
"I choose to know and love the 'real' me, even if Mommy couldn't."
"I choose to understand why Mommy could never 'see' me."
"I choose to feel close to Mommy because we both had the same problem."
"I choose to allow my real self to be seen."
This was probably the most important choice of all for Tara because she had been terribly afraid to take this chance before.
She took home the little blue cards with her choices written on them (I'll explain the process in a moment) and has used them ever since. The feeling that she could "know my real self" has grown in her as a result of this to a point where she has been largely able to dispense with the fagade she had had all her life.
She is now an intentionally fine and studied performer on stage (in fact she claims to be an even better one now) but unlike before, she is now able to be a 'real' person off stage, one whom she genuinely likes and respects, as do many others. Her choices have strongly reinforced the insights she gained during the EFT process.
If you would like to make use of Choices to consolidate gains made with EFT, here is the procedure I use:
At the end of an EFT session, when we have cleared, or partly cleared, important emotional blocks, I will suggest that the client formulate, along with me, a meaningful choice or series of choices (the latter covers more than one aspect) relating to the issue they have just been tapping on.
I then write down each choice for them, using their exact words, on a 3" by 5" card (usually light blue colored), a separate card for each choice, and hand these to the client at the end of the session. This little ritual has the effect of serving as a symbolic gift from me and is almost always treated with respect and seriousness because of this.
I then instruct the client to read over their choices at home, out loud, twice a day (at a minimum) -- when first waking in the morning, and before going to sleep at night. They may carry the cards with them and read aloud the choices when they find themselves with spare moments during the day -- such as in the car waiting for a traffic light to change, etc. Many people do this and some have even recorded their choices and listened to them on tape as they drive.
I tell the client not to bother to think about what is on the card between times, rather to just read aloud each choice once and then let it slip out of their mind, to enter their "subconscious" mind, which will do the work FOR them. That is, in fact, exactly what happens.
After that, from time to time during therapy, I will inquire about how a particular choice is progressing (is it manifesting in their life? If so, how?) since I keep a record of their choices in the patient records.
The formulating of the choice (or affirmation) is in itself a part of the therapy, serving to clarify the positive goals of the client. I use choices regularly hand in hand with EFT to achieve profound therapeutic change. In a future posting I'll talk about why I prefer to use Choices rather than straight affirmations (in most cases) and how I formulate the wording of them so they will be at their most effective. I'll also tell how I apply Gary's strikingly effective way of using EFT to deal with emotional blocks to the choices or affirmations and thereby greatly increase the effectiveness of the affirmations (see Gary's article) This is the opposite in a sense from using choices to assist EFT. I have found the combination of choices (affirmations) and EFT to be a powerful one that can greatly increase our helping skills. I hope you will enjoy trying it!
With best wishes,
Dr. Patricia Carrington had many positive responses to her recent message on Choices. Many of you asked her to say more on this subject and so Pat, as usual, graciously accepted.
I'm continuing here with my discussion of Choices (a type of affirmation used to consolidate gains made in EFT) which I described in my previous post. As a reminder, a way of wording a "Choice" for a person with a fear of public speaking would be, "I choose to feel confident and at ease when speaking before groups". This is different from a traditional form of affirmation addressing the same issue which would be, "I am confident and at ease when speaking before groups." Both are productive ways of using affirmations, but they differ somewhat in their effects, and in my experience are different in terms of their likelihood of being accepted by the average client.
There are of course times when I find traditional affirmations to be more suitable with EFT or with other forms of therapy, I'll speak about this later, but for the most part I use Choices to help carry over the effects of an EFT session into a client's everyday life. I have found this extremely helpful in solidifying changes outside of treatment sessions.
Choices seem to be more acceptable to many people because the conventional affirmation, which asserts that something is "so" in present time (which another part of the same person perceives as NOT being so), tends to invite what Gary has referred to as "tail-enders" (unspoken thoughts and reservations about the affirmation which can rob it of its effectiveness). Of course this isn't the only reason or even the primary reason that people have tail-enders, but my thinking goes like this -- Why invite trouble? If we can make an affirmation more comfortable and inviting by casting it in the form of a Choice - why not do that?
Familiarity and positive associations play a big role here. Choices are not perceived as "far out" because we all make choices every day and "having a choice" in a situation versus "having no choice" is clearly preferable. This is important because when we use EFT we are asking the average person to do a pretty unorthodox thing-- tapping on acupoints. And I find it helpful not to stretch their acceptance of new and unusual things too far by following this with the suggestion that they use a traditional affirmation -- unless the person is very used to and comfortable with these.
The use of Choices has been a pillar of my practice for years now and has enabled me to help my clients bring about transformations in their lives, not just symptom alleviation. It has helped to make permanent some magnificent insights that have appeared in the course of EFT. I estimate that about 75% of my sessions with clients at the present time end up with us formulating some "Personal Choices" which the client then takes home and uses. This procedure facilitates our therapy work by a multiple I can only guess at.
Another advantage of this approach is that making a Choice puts the person in the "Driver's Seat" in their life. The person making a choice is exercising their will, deciding on and committing to a course of action. I have found that this freely entered into commitment can have a powerful influence on the desired result, often making it more likely to be obtained. It doesn't by-pass the ego of the person in the manner that the traditional affirmation does, but instead it engages the ego (or self) in the process. Since it also accepts the reality of the present state of affairs, this makes for a healthy juxtaposition of present reality and desired outcome -- creating a strong pull toward the latter.
One way of using Choices -- it's a way that can also be used with traditional affirmations, although I've seldom seen this done -- is that the "tail-enders", which almost always exist as Gary points out (see Gary's article), can often be handled by the wording of the Choice itself -- built into it so to speak
A client of mine, "Judy" provides an example of this. She wanted to move into a "beautiful, sunny, spacious apartment" but had not been able to get herself to do the things required to bring about such a move. Clearly there were hidden issues blocking her, and as we tapped on "Even though I'm afraid I'll never find that great apartment", her thoughts tuned to her older sister who was resentful about having to live in her own dingy walk-up. This sister had been jealous of Judy all their lives. Judy had been prettier and more popular from day one, but had always tried to please her sister whom she had looked up to greatly as a child.
As she tapped, Judy realized that her need for her sister's love was an important factor blocking her from going all out to obtain a new apartment, and so we turned to working on this aspect:
"Even though (sister's name) will be jealous of me if I get a great apartment...."
"Even though she won't love me if I get a great apartment..."
"Even though she'll be mad at me if I get a great apartment..." etc.,
We continued until Judy's SUDS level (her emotional intensity rating on a 0-10 scale) had come down to zero. She was now able to visualize herself going out and actively seeking the apartment, and finding it.
When we came to the end of this session we formulated a Choice for her to take home and work with (I describe this process in my former post). Since the need for a family member's love is likely to have many aspects to it, some of which we had not handled as yet, I wanted to facilitate her dealing with this issue outside of therapy and so suggested that she build into her Choice a phrase that would address the potential tail-ender. The wording we settled on for her Choice was:
"I choose to feel loved while living in a beautiful, spacious, sunny apartment."
Notice that I didn't suggest she say "I choose to have my sister love me while,..etc.". We can't choose for another person how they should feel or act or be -- only for ourselves. So instead I suggested she formulate the Choice so that she would have a subjective feeling of being loved as she lived in that apartment. We can choose to have any feeling that we want.
This simultaneously addressed her wish for a lovely apartment and the tail-ender at the same time. While we had to do some more tapping on other aspects of this issue in the next therapy session, Judy was actively looking for apartments and getting the word out among friends by the time she arrived for her session. Within three weeks she had found a 'beautiful, sunny, spacious apartment' which she moved into confidently.
Of course, people sometimes find a choice such as "feeeling loved" very difficult to make. If so, then we can use EFT to deal with that issue. After removing some of the blocks, we can then help them formulate some additional all-encompassing choices such as: "I choose to feel lovable." or "I choose to feel loved.", or address deservedness issues through a Choice.
An occasional person may experience the Choice phraseology as setting the goal off in the future and therefore as less compelling than the direct traditional form of affirmation. I have rarely found this to be the case, however. My experience has been that the "subconscious" does not interpret the wording of a Choice in this manner. I can't count the number of times a Choice made by a client, or one of my friends, or me, has been realized -- whether two hours from the moment they conceived of the choice, or three weeks from the date it was first used daily, or a year, or whenever.
Much of what I've been saying about the use of affirmations with EFT applies in most cases to all affirmations, be they couched as Choices or as direct reframes of present reality as in traditional affirmations. I find that the traditional forms of affirmation can be superbly effective in certain therapeutic contexts and the method of choice for them. For example, when I use Gary's Advanced EFT intuiting technique (where he suggests progressive changes in phrasing to deal with core issues while the client taps the karate chop point) I have found that by using direct statements and affirmations, with no "frills" or anything else to impede the process, I can go right to the heart of the matter and join with the client in a deep and complete sense. It would be inappropriate to water down these powerful statements in any way.
Also, there are some global issues that seem to cry out for a direct statement -- they seem to be beyond choice. For example, a client of mine had been struggling with an issue of individuation -- she constantly saw herself through her mother's eyes ("What would Mom think about this?"). After she had dealt with some of the issues around her mother in therapy, she made this Choice to help her progress-- it followed from an insight that had come to her during tapping:
"The real me is known only to me and God."
It would have been inappropriate to have formulated this as a Choice as in, "I CHOOSE to have the real me known only to me and God." This client's belief system fully supported the affirmation she had made and to artificially introduce an act of choice here could have watered down the impact of the affirmation. In fact, her affirmation turned out to be extremely helpful for this young woman, reminding her repeatedly as she worked with it at home of her existence apart from her mother, in a very positive way.
It is a clinical judgment whether or not to suggest a Choice or a traditional affirmation in a given instance. While I've found that Choices are preferred most of the time, the direct reframe used in a traditional affirmation, where appropriate, can have a powerful impact often not obtainable by a Choice. I encourage you to try both approaches, and to use affirmations (whichever form) freely and creatively in your work with EFT.
With best wishes, Pat
Patricia Carrington, Ph.D.
Dr. Patricia Carrington received substantial interest from advanced readers of this list regarding her "Choices" method for adjusting the EFT Set-Up Phrase. Accordingly, she has expanded on the idea with a third article.
Never underestimate the power of the Internet -- or, for that matter, of this List! What I'm going to share with you today is a discovery that came about as a result of my posts here concerning the use of "Choices" with EFT. (Choices are affirmations which differ from the traditional ones in that the statement of desired outcome is preceded by the words, "I choose to..." instead of by a simple declarative phrase such as "I am, I have").
Several subscribers to this List wrote to thank me for suggesting that they introduce Choices into the EFT Set-Up phrase. The universe works in strange ways -- actually I had not suggested that particular use, but here were people applying it with intriguing results. Also, Christine Sutherland (Director of the Meridian Therapies List), who had not thought that I suggested it but had thought it a natural thing to try, wrote me about several successes she has had using Choices in this way. Clearly this new use for Choices was "out there in the air" for people to pick up on.
This "serendipitous" happening struck me as possibly an important lead in disguise, so I set out to investigate the use of Choices in the set-up phrase by trying this out on myself first, something I regularly do when exploring a new possibility. I was immediately impressed by its effects on me and, when I used it with my clients, I obtained similar positive results. Accordingly, I have combined the new "Choice Set-Up" with my Alternate Phrase technique, refined this approach, and mapped out guidelines for its use. I think it may be of use to us all.
In the "Choice Set-Up," you replace the self-acceptance affirmation used at the end of the EFT set-up phrase by a Choice addressing the problem at hand. The reminder phrase that follows can take several forms. Which one is selected in a particular instance is determined by the judgment of the therapist and the preferences of the client. The reminder phrase can be:
(1) Just the negative portion of the set-up phrase (the "even though" part, without the "even though"). I find this to be the best approach when a person is so overwhelmed by a negative emotion that they simply cannot contemplate anything positive at that point.
(2) Both the negative portion AND the positive portion of the set-up phrase, used with in alternate rounds of the treatment. In this method the negative portion of the set-up phrase is used throughout the first round, and the positive portion (the Choice) is used throughout the second round. The two rounds are in a sense coupled and constitute a single "treatment" sequence. If more work needs to be done, then the alternating rounds (a negative round followed by a positive round) is repeated as many times as necessary. This sequencing links up a negative cognition with a positive one, something I will talk about in a minute.
(3) Just the positive portion of the set-up phrase (that is, the Choice itself). I find this to be particularly useful when the person has already cleared out enough of their negative feelings so that they can now contemplate the positive in full force. I often use it to wind up the tapping series
Will the Choice Set-Up ever replace the valuable self-acceptance phrase which has been the mainstay of our EFT practice? Actually I do not think we need to or should choose between the two. Both approaches seem to be useful in their own right, and each can be the preferred method under certain circumstances. In a later post, I will discuss when I am finding one or the other to be more useful for a particular purpose.
To give you an idea of how the Choice Set-Up works out in practice, here is how one of my clients, "Brian", used it recently. Brian was driving to an interview which was very important to him when he found himself caught in a traffic jam and realized that he was now going to be late for this appointment. Being an experienced EFTer, he decided to do some tapping on himself. Ordinarily he would have used the standard EFT Set-Up phrase, which might have gone, " Even though I feel furious and anxious about the delay, I deeply and completely accept myself." As we all know, this might well have reduced his distress. However, he decided to try the Choice Set-Up he learned from me earlier in the week, and tells me that its effect on him seems to have been even more positive than when he used the standard set-up phrase in the past.
In the Choice Set-Up, the person is to come up with a Choice which is the direct opposite of their unwanted state, in a sense an antidote to it. So Brian picked, "Even though I feel furious and anxious, I choose to have this unexpected delay work to my advantage." Of course he could just as easily have said, "I choose to be calm and confident when I walk in for the interview" or made some other Choice which could have counteracted the problem he was experiencing. The only rule he had to follow was that it would have had to be a targeted statement aimed at the specific challenge he was facing, rather than a general self-acceptance statement.
He used as his reminder phrase, "I feel furious and anxious about the delay," which was the negative portion of his set-up phrase. After tapping on this for several rounds, his SUDS level (rating of distress on a 0-10 point scale) was now almost down to a zero (the familiar EFT success story) and he felt relaxed and philosophical about his problem. However, the full effectiveness of this approach was yet to be seen. After a few more minutes of waiting, the police loudspeakers announced that all traffic was being re-routed through another town. Because this rather long detour meant adding 20 to 30 minutes to his trip, Brian was jolted out of his relaxed state. In his words his stomach "tightened as though in a vise".
What happened next is what is of special interest here. Immediately following this initial negative reaction, Brian seemed to hear the faint and muffled words in his mind. This optimistic thought seemed to pull him out of the negative state and he found himself thinking instead about how he could tell his interviewers on the cell phone about this delay in such a way that he would come across as wonderfully cool under trying circumstances, something that could only serve him well in the eventual interview.
As he drove on, he used the time to plan out how he would condense his presentation when he did arrive so that the interviewers would be impressed with his on-the-spot resourcefulness. Actually, he was so pleased with the way he was able to map this out that he entered the interview with a confidence that apparently did impress them, for he was approved for the transfer to another division of his company (which was the reason he had sought this interview).
This positive shift in attitude after using the Choice Set-Up seems to be typical of many people. Although I or others may not recall the actual words of our Choices when confronted by a later challenge as Brian did, we often find ourselves experiencing our chosen positive state when our original negative state (the "negative cognition") is set-off again by some new challenge.
But WHY should this happen? What mechanism could be at work here? This is an important question. My hunch is that the Choice Set-Up establishes a strong "link" (in psychological terms a "conditioned response") between the person's negative cognition (the "Even though...." phrase) and his or her positive cognition (the "I choose...." phrase). This link, I think, is created at a very deep level because of the highly suggestible state brought about by the tapping. EFT provides a superb condition for creating positive cognitions and deepening insights, as witness the effectiveness of Gary's Advanced EFT Techniques where the client is open to deeper and deeper insights and self-confrontations as the tapping proceeds.
Once a link is formed between a person's negative cognition and their positive Choice, the negative cognition now becomes a trigger that automatically evokes the positive Choice each time it is activated. For those familiar with Neurolinguistic Programming (NLP), the negative cognition has now become an "anchor" for that person's positive Choice, automatically calling it forth. If we think about it, what could possibly be better?
Such a process would have important implications for our lives because in most problematic situations, a negative reaction (thoughts of doom, of being trapped, of one's stomach ache, etc.) tend to occur not just once, but repeatedly. In the case of an adverse physical condition, for example, thoughts about it can occur hundreds of times in a single day as the annoying condition (such as a running nose or sore throat) intrudes itself repeatedly on our consciousness Each time it does, the positive Choice in our set-up and reminder phrases will be triggered in our minds. Do you know what repetition does to ensure that something "takes" in our psyche's? Everything!! It is an invaluable aid to change.
I find that a switch from a negative to a positive attitude tends to occur when using a Choice Set-Up (that is more specific to the problem at hand) than when we use the standard self-acceptance phrase-- except, as I said, under those circumstances which seem to respond more readily to the self-acceptance phrase (as I promised, I will address these in a future post).
I now find myself using the Choice Set-Up in EFT rather than the standard self-acceptance phrase about 90-95% of the time with myself, and about 80% of the time with my clients, probably because my extensive experience with Choices allows me to handle them more easily than others may at first. In a future post I will talk about the rules that govern effective Choice making, but since many of these are similar to the guidelines which govern effective affirmation-creating in general, you may want to review Gary's excellent discussion of these in The Palace of Possibilities (see Gary's article).
With warmest wishes,
Patricia Carrington, Ph.D.
Dr. Patricia Carrington continues her popular series on using "Choices" within the EFT procedures. This time she gives us a two part article that displays in great detail her application of this method for a client. Please note her introduction of the "Choice Trio" and her proficient use of Dr. Carol Look's weight loss protocol.
I am becoming increasingly impressed with the potential of EFT to foster goal-directed inner growth AS WELL AS (note emphasis here!) its undeniably wonderful ability to alleviate distress. For this reason I have been looking for ways to use positive "Choices" in EFT to formulate more specific and purposeful goals for people using it. I find that healing is promoted if we have fulfillment, joy and a sense of meaning, and Choices can be used effectively to foster these attitudes.
Along these lines I'd like to share with you some recent observations I have made about the Choice process as it has been working for my client "Joan", whose story illustrates both the stress-reduction AND the personal fulfillment potentials of EFT.
Joan, has been in therapy for over a year. She originally consulted me for a weight problem coupled with a pervasive low-grade depression. Until recently, however, she has made only modest progress in her therapy despite the fact that we have used EFT extensively. We addressed some deeply troubling issues such as (1) her deep shame and hatred of her body and (2) various aspects of her father's verbal abuse of her as a child (for example, when he would refer to her, while driving, as "that fat pig in the back seat" in front of other children and her family). While there had been some useful clearing of the emotional pain around that and other incidents, the fact was that Joan was not getting significantly better.
This troubled me, and finally I reluctantly suggested that she might need to see a physician for some form of anti-depressant medication to assist her therapy along. This was because her depression was the kind that so often accompanies overweight problems (whereby food is used as a means of self-medication, helping her to avoid depression). Joan refused my suggestion to seek medication, however, stating that she wanted to handle it on her own.
Joan is a tall, heavy-boned young woman with a pretty face half hidden by cascades of almost jet black wavy hair. She is intelligent and perceptive but there is a sadness about her, and her speech is often interrupted by sighs. She has had a lifelong struggle with overweight and has worked with one support group and diet system after another in an effort to cope with it. Although she is not grossly obese, she is distinctly too heavy for her own health and her potential attractiveness is obscured by the overweight.
Little by little Joan and I have made inroads in her sense of failure and self-belittlement -- tap, tap, tap -- but often treating her has seemed as though we were managing to lift up her spirits by the end of one session, only to have her return for her next appointment with sadness and hopelessness in her eyes again. It felt as though we were trying to lift a heavy bag of sand while one side of it kept sagging back down again.
Recently, however, this discouraging situation has dramatically shifted and Joan is now making major gains in her therapy. This came about after two new ingredients were introduced into our work together. I began to use Carol Look's Weight Loss Program with Joan and I combined this approach with the use of strategic Choices in EFT designed to counteract each of the core problems that Carol identifies in her program.
This has enabled Joan to uncover a number of core issues that she had not identified before. At each session, we go through Carol's list of possible EFT phrases one by one (a few at each session), with Joan identifying those that seem to hit the spot, as well as those that appear irrelevant to her and don't "ring a bell". When we uncover a compelling issue we address it by making a custom-designed (that is, just for Joan) Choice which can counteract it.
It often takes some time for Joan and myself working together to formulate just the right positive Choice for each issue, but we have found that the time we spend honing in on the most appropriate Choices is well spent. When we hit on the phrase that is the exact opposite of the negative ( "even though ..." ) statement, it can be startlingly effective
Formulating the Choice that fits the bill takes some work on our parts because Joan, like most of us, does not always find it easy to think up a Choice about a new way of being that will represent true healing of her problem rather than be a superficial "band aid" kind of change. Most people have a very limited idea of what is possible for them and what is most desirable in the long run. Here is where another person's viewpoint, such as that of a therapist, can be extremely valuable.
Following this procedure we have hit on what Joan has referred to as "real eye-openers", possibilities for new ways of being that she has not thought about before but which have turned out to be deeply healing for her. I will give some examples of this process later. But first let me share with you the protocol which I am using for the EFT Choice technique. I call it the "Choice Trio". It is turning out to be the most effective way of using the Choice method that I have yet worked with. Here is how it goes:
First take the initial SUDS rating (a measure of distress on a 0 to 10 point scale) then proceed with the following steps:
1) Identify the negative cognition (attitude) the person wants to be rid of (the same procedure as in standard EFT).
2) Next, formulate a Choice which is the exact opposite of this negative cognition For example: "I choose to feel wonderfully at ease when speaking in front of groups." would be an appropriate Choice if the negative cognition were "Even though I'm afraid of public speaking"., etc.
3) Now combine the negative cognition with the positive Choice (which is the desired outcome) to form the set-up phrase. For example,. "Even though I'm afraid of public speaking, I choose to feel wonderfully at ease when speaking in front of groups".
4) Use the standard EFT protocol of rubbing the sore spot (or tapping the Karate chop spot) three times while repeating the set-up phrase.
Follow this by the "Choice Trio" as follows:
5) Do ONE round of EFT using the negative cognition ONLY as the reminder phrase. For example, "I'm afraid of public speaking" repeated at each acupoint in the standard EFT protocol.
6) Follow this immediately (without checking SUDS or doing another set-up) by ONE round using the Choice statement ONLY as the reminder phrase. For example, "I choose to feel wonderfully at ease when speaking in front of groups.", repeated at each acupoint in the standard EFT sequence.
7) Follow this immediately (without checking Suds or doing another set-up) by ONE round using the Alternate Phrase Technique. This works as follows: At the first acupoint (Inner Eyebrow) use the negative cognition as the reminder phrase, at the next (Outer Eye) acupoint use the positive Choice as the reminder phrase, at the next (Under Eye) acupoint again use the negative cognition as the reminder phrase etc. Continue until you end at the karate chop point which allows the person to end the sequence with a positive Choice, an important factor as I will explain later. If you end the sequence at the under arm spot, the person ends up making a negative statement, an undesirable condition-- however if the EFT shortcut sequence is used just add another point at the end. For example, the person can jump from underarm spot to karate chop spot, in order for the sequence to end up with a positive Choice.
8) Retake the SUDS rating and if more work is needed, repeat the Trio (points 5, 6 and 7 above) as many times as necessary. In effect, the Trio serves as an extended "round".
This constitutes the Choice Trio. It can of course be varied according to the needs of the person. For example, if they are still too upset to contemplate using a positive Choice statement as a reminder phrase, then step 1 of the Trio (just using the negative cognition) should be repeated for several consecutive rounds until some of the charge has been taken off of it and the person is ready to proceed to the next step
I find many advantages to using the Choice Set-Up in this manner. For one thing, the initial negative round (or rounds) serve to remove the negative charge from the problem as in standard EFT, and I find that this negative charge must be removed first before any positive installation can be fully effective.
The complete round which uses only the positive Choice, (when the person is ready for it, that is) can have a profoundly stabilizing effect very early in the treatment, often serving to de-traumatize the person almost instantly concerning the problem at hand. In my observation, it serves a "rescue" function just as the Tearless Trauma Technique does because by using it the person does not have to drown in the emotional pain of the event. This fact is deeply appreciated and can make cooperation with the treatment much easier.
I find it is most important to begin with the negative reminder phrase first-- whether this occurs through the whole round of the negative Choice (Step 1 of the Trio) followed by a whole round of the Choice (Step 2 of the Trio), or if we alternate negative and positive cognitions (Step 3 of the Trio). The reason order is so important here is that one of the most essential aspects of the Choice method is to have negative cognitions (thoughts/attitudes) followed by awareness of their positive desired outcomes. This results in direct LINKING of the negative with the positive -- what NLP used to call "chaining". This is a simple and powerful device. Using it, a negative thought can become an "anchor" (NLP term for a "trigger") for a positive thought, so that in the future every time this person thinks of this negative possibility, the positive thought is likely to pop into their mind right afterwards.
An example of this is the case of a colleague of mine who recently contracted a bad cold two days before she was to leave for Mexico on a very important trip. She had been tapping for the cold to no avail, but when on my suggestion she formulated the set-up phrase, "Even though I have this terrible cold, I choose to be comfortable and healthy on my flight to Mexico." (and followed this by the appropriate reminder phrases and the Trio) she felt better, and by the next day had no cold symptoms AND she had a "comfortable and healthy" trip to Mexico.
What is particularly interesting though is that for the first day after the EFT treatment, whenever she found herself blowing her nose and thinking "I have this terrible cold!" thoughts of a comfortable and healthy trip to Mexico seemed to jump into her mind. This suggests that the negative cognition had begun to trigger a positive one. I believe this may be the main reason why the Choice Set-up, or any variation of it such as discussed by Mair Llewellyn-Edwards in a recent post, works so well.
How we used the Choice Trio to handle Joan's problem of depression and overweight I will discuss in my next post.
With warmest wishes,
In this post I'm continuing my report on "Joan", my client who has struggled with an underlying depression, sense of hopelessness and overweight for many years.
As Joan was giving her reactions to the set-up phrases suggested in Carol Look's program, the first one that struck her as possibly applying to her situation was "Even though I feel hurt about being abandoned..." She explained that although she didn't exactly feel "abandoned", having been an "army brat" as a child had made her constantly lose contact with friends important to her. Her family had moved from one army post to another during her childhood and sometimes she had had to attend two different schools, each far distant from each other, within one year. Any friends she made had been fleeting, expendable and impermanent. Food, however, had always been there for her -- a constant, predictable and dependable thing. The statement that Joan came up with for the negative portion of her set-up phrase was:
"Even though I don't want to let go of my only dependable friend, food..."
We then searched for a positive Choice to counteract her feeling of loss of a friend if she didn't have the food she wanted. This took some work because Joan could not at first think of any phrase without the word "not" in it, and a negative Choice is not a good one. My first suggestion for a Choice for her didn't land -- it just didn't feel right to Joan -- but then she came up with the following Choice which felt very meaningful to her. It was:
"I choose to have serenity and peace within myself, no matter what."
She used this statement in what I call the "Choice Trio". As outlined in my previous post, this consists of the Choice Set-Up followed by three consecutive rounds of EFT conducted in the following way:
1. Choice Set-Up (including the negative statement, "even though", and the positive statement (Choice) -- all in one sentence.
2. One complete round of EFT using the negative statement ONLY as a reminder phrase. In this round Joan repeated "I don't want to let go of my only dependable friend, food..." while tapping at each acupoint.
3. One round using the positive statement (the Choice) ONLY as the reminder phrase, in this round Joan repeated "I choose to have serenity and peace no matter what" while tapping at each acupoint.
4. One final round using the negative statement on the first acupoint, the positive one on the next acupoint, the negative on the following acupoint etc., and alternating in this fashion for the entire round.
This strategy had an immediate positive impact on Joan who spontaneously commented, "That was very calming to me. Thinking of the lack of dependability of people in my life, it felt so good to have that choice."
Then, as happens when things start flowing in a session, she brought up another topic.
She had not been able to stick to a "Shake" diet called Metafast which she had been using successfully for over a year. It substitutes shakes for much of her food, and this had seemed to be effective and healthy for her, and much easier for her to follow than a regular diet. But now something seemed missing without the more fattening food.
To work on this issue she chose as her negative statement: "Even though I haven't been able to stick to Metafast".
The next task was to come up with a positive Choice. What could directly contradict, and potentially solve this problem for her?
After careful thought, she formulated a simple, almost obvious type of Choice, "I choose to stick with Metafast and feel comforted." It's not too often that one has to resort to such a direct opposite statement for the Choice, but when it's appropriate it can be extremely effective, even when first saying it may sound absurd to the person. But remember that the EFT default self-acceptance statement, "I deeply and profoundly accept myself", can also sound absurd to some people at first, but as it is repeated it can come to have deep meaning.
Joan decided on the set-up phrase, "Even though I haven't been able to stick with Metafast, I choose to stick with Metafast and feel comforted." To measure where she stood with it, I suggested that she use a Truth rating instead of the SUDS Distress rating, also on a 10 point scale with the highest score perceived as absolutely True and the lowest (zero) as absolutely False (this procedure is derived from a somewhat similar one used in EMDR with a 7 point scale). When asked how true the positive statement (her Choice) seemed to her, Joan had only a "1" before she started tapping because it barely seemed possible to her that she could stick with the Metafast. After doing the trio, however, her confidence in the truth of that statement had risen to an 8, and she looked brighter and there was more color in her face.
She still had some concern about the fact that she had recently been "slipping" with her diet, so we addressed this directly in the next trio. Her next set-up phrase was: "Even though I've been slipping with the Metafast, I choose to stick with the Metafast and feel comforted". One more round of the trio and the positive statement was now completely believable to her -- a 10 on the "truth" scale -- and our session ended.
However, we were by no means finished with our exploration of the core issues that underlay her compulsive overeating. Although Joan returned for her next session with her spirits unusually high and was very encouraged about the progress she was making and above all about an inner feeling of optimism and well being she is now experiencing, she located another issue involving her weight problem.
"If I didn't have my weight to obsess about I'd feel bored. I'm afraid of that." she said.
We needed a Choice which could counteract boredom and together we came up with one which seemed right to her -- it was, "I Choose to find it (the lack of her usual comfort from food) an exciting opportunity to try new things", and so she used the following set-up phrase -- "Even though I would be bored if I didn't have food to obsess about, I choose to find it an exciting opportunity to try new things."
Initially this positive statement was very low on the scale of believability for her, only a 2 or 3 rating for its "truth", but after doing the trio, it felt so true to her that its truth score had risen to an 8 or 9.
"It felt so good to put those two things together, the boredom and the excitement." She said. "I got good energy from doing that. I got a feeling like 'What could I do instead that would be exciting? I think I actually might think of some exciting things!"
But right after saying this she was stopped again with the thought -- "But not eating all the time would leave a gap in my life! I think I'm afraid of that gap!" This is what we so often see with a core issue, it may seem gone at first but it really isn't yet because we've dealt with only one aspect of it. A lifelong issue tends to have many, many aspects.
We turned now to her fear of what she referred to as "the gap" that could occur in her life if she stopped over-eating. The sentence which she decided on was:
"Even though I'm afraid of the gap that might occur if I stop all that eating, I choose to have a sense of wonder and joy about life." She even smiled as she said this.
After tapping on it until those good feelings seemed "real" to her, she tried another related phrase to address some uncertainty that still lingered about thinking of things to fill the gap. Her next phrase was:
"Even though I'm uncertain about what to do about filling that gap, I choose to have a sense of wonder and joy about life.", and so on -- tap, tap, tap.
Finally Joan heaved a sigh of relief. She was now down to a 2 on the SUDS (10 point distress level), whereas she had started with a SUDS of 9 when she had thought about the gap.
As usual, I handed Joan her Choice Set-Up statements written out on 3" x 5" cards to take home and read aloud to herself twice a day, morning and night, a method I find very effective in reinforcing the impact of EFT, and she left encouraged.
Since then Joan and I have been systematically working our way through the Weight Loss Program and she has been tapping on new and liberating Choices in her sessions. She now finds herself more diligent about her diet, less fanatic and considerably less self-punishing, and she no longer finds she needs Metafast, a more moderate approach seems to be working better for her. Her weight loss support group finds her new attitude extremely positive and so do I.
But what I find even more important than her improved dieting is the fact that Joan now comes into her therapy sessions with a smile on her face. She is positive and hopeful about her life, not just about the weight loss. This indicates to me that we are making headway where it really counts. Joan's self image is changing with the EFT, and her sense of being worthwhile and able to help herself out of the emotional morass she had been in has been greatly increased. While she is not one of those clients who tend to use EFT on their own -- some do this readily and productively and others do not -- she is nevertheless able to use it superbly in her sessions, and it is exciting to watch what she is doing with it. I have an extremely good feeling about the eventual outcome of her treatment.
With warmest wishes,
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