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Articles & Ideas


Tapping for negative self-talk - "I am unable to step out of it"

Important Note: This article was written prior to 2010 and is now outdated. Please use my newest advancement, Optimal EFT. It is more efficient, more powerful and clearly explained in my free e-book, The Unseen Therapist™.  Best wishes, Gary

Hi Everyone,

Gabriele Rother from Germany uses an interesting "writing on the wall" metaphor to help her client eliminate some persistent, and limiting, self talk.

Hugs, Gary

By Gabriele Rother, EFT Trainer, EFT ADV

A lady called me who had tapped a lot on her problems, but with few results.  She told me that even when she did get some results, some time later the thought came back: “I am unable to resolve it!”

She had a car accident 10 years previously and couldn’t walk since then.  Her first thought after the accident was, “I’ll never be able to step out of this!”  She tapped a lot, but it was very resistant.  There was still a panic left that she would lose people and a fear of being left alone.  A good friend of hers died a few months previously and another friend suffers from cancer.  Her feeling always was:” I cannot stand it, I am not able to step out of this!”

I asked her to imagine this writing on the wall “I am unable to step out of it!”  She got the picture of fat black letters, deeply engraved in the wall.  The level of intensity was at 10 on a scale of 0 to 10.

Then we started tapping: I am free!  I’ve got it!  I stepped out of it!  I can move!  We tapped a new positive statement at every point.  Her voice was small and hushed.  I asked her to sing it out loud and started singing: I am free tralala, I have got it tralala, and she started singing and tapping, too.

After one round she felt a lot better, less depressed and her writing on the wall was sort of smeary, the letters seemed to melt away.  I asked her about her feelings.  During the talk the old pattern of negative thinking started again and her energy level sunk down again.  She told me about her parents, she always felt responsible for the wellbeing of her mother, and she always felt guilty when she wasn’t able to resolve her problems, especially when they divorced.

We tapped this feeling:

Dear mom, I am your child.  I carried the responsibility for your wellbeing for a long time.  I give it back to you with respect and love.  It is too much for me.  I am only a child and I am too small to be responsible for you.  You are my mother and I love you.  All the things which happened between dad and you as partners are not my responsibility.  I leave it with you.  You are the parents and I am the child.  Even if you aren’t together any longer, I love both of you.

Her tears were running and she felt a big release.  We tapped similar phrases for her father, who wanted to have a son and refused to come to the hospital to visit her mother, when she was born.  However, he broke into tears sitting next to her bed in the hospital right after the car accident. This tapping round gave her a deep feeling of calmness and she could feel her father’s love and support.  All the feelings of being rejected by him were gone.

Thereafter we checked her writings on the wall again – it faded almost away except for a grey shadow.  I asked her what feelings were still there.  She felt doubtful, and worried that the problem would come back – a quite normal reaction, especially in her situation.

Again we tapped a singing tapping round: I am a wonderful woman, tralala, I am a beautiful woman, tralala, I am a beloved woman tralala, I am free now, tralala, I stepped out now, tralala, I am happy, tralala, I changed my mind into positive, tralala, I am able to get it!  Tralala...

After this last round she was happy and excited, her voice was modulated in a totally different way.  We checked the writings and the panic and they were totally gone!  I asked her to write a new statement on the wall and she chose: I am able to step out and I am always free!

I told her to watch her thought pattern and to tap and change it immediately when they popped into her mind.  I taught her the Choices Technique (Pat Carrington, be blessed for it!) and how to use it to change the downward spiral of her negative thoughts into an upwards spiral of energy and joy!

Later she called and told me, that she had good results with it and that she felt really different. She loved to sing the positive statements and it helped her a lot.

I am really grateful for this!




Explore our newest advancement, Optimal EFT™, by reading my free e-book, The Unseen Therapist™. More efficient. More powerful.