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Children

Fears

Handling a child's fear of being home alone

Important Note: This article was written prior to 2010 and is now outdated. Please use my newest advancement, Optimal EFT. It is more efficient, more powerful and clearly explained in my free e-book, The Unseen Therapist™.  Best wishes, Gary

Here's a very common fear among children that was easily handled by Vicki Hughes. Note how thoroughly and completely the relief was reflected in the child's subsequent behavior.


By Vicki Hughes EFT/ADV


I worked with the 11 year old daughter of a friend recently. I will call her "Carol." She had a fear of being home by herself, and while she is very mature in many areas of her life, and they live in a very safe, country house, she was very anxious and nervous about staying at the house by herself, even briefly for her mom to run an errand.

Carol's primary fear was that if she was at the house without her parents, something unexpected would happen, and she would freak herself out. Before we tapped, we discussed the idea that she could sit down with her mom and dad and make sure she had an action plan in case something came up. They have very good neighbors who can look in on her if there were any type of an emergency, etc.

I also shared with her a new way of looking at the idea. I told her when I was about her age, I used to enjoy pretending I was the "lady of the house" and I would imagine being all grown up, and that it was "my" house, and how much fun I had imagining being all grown up. This idea seemed to resonate with Carol, and she smiled and nodded her head as I told her about this way of thinking about being home by herself.

We tapped on the following, "Even though it freaks me out to think of being here at the house by myself, I'm a really cool kid." We also tapped on, "Even though I am afraid something unexpected will happen that I can't handle if my mom leaves me at the house by myself, I choose to let it be a fun adventure."

Carol's fear of being home alone was a 10 before we started, and after one round on each of these setup statements, she could not locate any intensity over the idea of being home alone. She laughed at the idea that she was not really concerned with it at all.

We did this tapping about 4 weeks ago, and I just had a very interesting conversation with her mom. I called to ask her if they had had any opportunity to test out the effectiveness of the tapping on her fears of staying at the house by herself. Her mom said, "Well, actually, yes. I had totally forgotten about you tapping on that, but we have a friend staying here with us, and I have had to take him to work several times recently, and Carol stayed here by herself with no problems at all." I asked her if that was unusual, and she said, "Yes, very!"

She went on to say that when the time came to take her friend to work she had said, "Carol, I need to run them over to work, do you want to stay here or go with me?" and Carol voluntarily chose to stay at the house alone. It was only after I brought it up that Carol's mom even realized how unusual this was, and she had to laugh at the fact that Carol had been so comfortable that no one in their family even batted an eye at this unusual development.

Joy To You!

Vicki Hughes
Life Coach, EFT/ADV
Zoe Life Coaching

More articles on Children's Issues

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