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Resolving a family fight with surrogate EFT

Important Note: This article was written prior to 2010 and is now outdated. Please use my newest advancement, Optimal EFT. It is more efficient, more powerful and clearly explained in my free e-book, The Unseen Therapist™.  Best wishes, Gary

Hi Everyone,

Angela Treat Lyon observes a tense family fight in a local art store and resolves the whole thing through surrogate tapping. Note her intuitive use of language. Very well done. For those interested in the permission aspect of surrogate tapping please see

Hugs, Gary

By Angela Treat Lyon

Hi Gary,

I thought you'd be amused at this little story.  I was just at a local craft store getting some painting supplies, and have to tell you what happened.

When I walked into the store, there was a noticeable feeling of tension.  People were glancing over their shoulders at a couple and their 10 or 11 year-old daughter who were shouting at each other.  It was very uncomfortable for everyone, and no one quite knew what to do about it, as it was almost loud enough to be abusive.

I purposely went over near them to listen in - my impish EFT-maniac-self wanted to do some surrogate stuff on them.

It was obvious that, if they had wanted to, they could have bought anything in the store, but the mother acted as if a 39-cent piece of paper and a 3-dollar bottle of paint were going to break their bank for the next year.

And she was screaming at the girl, "Why do you have to paint it white?  I think you should paint it red!  And why so big?  You should...." etc.

The girl was trying to answer, but all she could say was, "But MOM, my teacher said ...." and "You never let me finish!"

As soon as she said that, the mother yelled at her more, and the father, on the girl's side, stepped in between them and said, "Well, why don't we get the paint for her and ...." and the mother stepped in again.

Back and forth, back and forth - it was so awful, and the mother's and girl's faces got redder and redder, the father looking around, obviously embarrassed seeing everyone looking at them, and no real resolution in sight.

So I thought I'd try a little experimentation.  I went a little farther away from them and turned my back, and started tapping very unobtrusively on my collarbone - as if I was quietly keeping tune with an inner song or something.  And I just let my intuition rip - here's what I said silently as I tapped:

FOR THE MOM: I never got to do projects like this when I was a kid!  I'm jealous!  How come you get to do all the cool stuff!  I want to paint, too!  I want to get some paint in the colors I like, and make something, too!  No one ever bought me anything, and even if they had, they'd have laughed at me and said what I did was trash.  No one ever listened to what I wanted!  I had to do what they wanted - and now I'm doing the same thing to my little girl!

FOR THE GIRL: No one ever listens to me!  I'm so mad!  I want to do a good job but Mom wants me to do it her way.  If I do it won't be what my teacher said to do.  I wish she'd just lay off!

FOR THE DAD: I wish I could help but it just seems no one listens to me.  I wish my wife would stay home and I could take my daughter out to get what she needs - it'd be so much easier.

And so on - and isn't it interesting that the common factor was "no one ever listens to me"?

I tapped until I couldn't think of anything more, and I gave a great sigh - it took maybe a minute and a half.

I had been pretty much concentrating on tapping without paying much attention to what was going on around me, so I was a bit surprised afterwards when I looked over at them, and there was the mom with (!!!!) her own paint and paper (!!!!), there was the daughter with hers, and everyone with big smiles, and the mom and girl were laughing and talking about how they were going to do their projects together.  Dad was standing aside, his color back in his face, grinning and pleased.  When they walked away to the register, I noticed that the feeling in the store itself was completely shifted.

I'm bowled over all the time with the possibilities inherent in EFT - using it singularly, in groups, surrogate, on the phone, on animals.  It is just simply one of the coolest things I've had the good fortune to have come across in my life.  I'm so grateful to be not only able to use it for my own good, but for those around me - whether they know it or not!


Angela Treat Lyon


Explore our newest advancement, Optimal EFT™, by reading my free e-book, The Unseen Therapist™. More efficient. More powerful.