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Articles & Ideas

Using EFT

Using EFT to Enhance Bedroom Romance

Important Note: This article was written prior to 2010 and is now outdated. Please use my newest advancement, Optimal EFT. It is more efficient, more powerful and clearly explained in my free e-book, The Unseen Therapist™.  Best wishes, Gary

This may be one of the most actively read articles on our web site. Rebecca Marina runs EFT sessions with women designed to rekindle their libido and romantic desires. She reports high success rates but cautions that her process is not aimed at deep traumatic experiences.

Part 1--Dianna
Part 2--Isabelle

By Rebecca Marina

Part 1--Dianna

I just finished with my first Intimacy related issues client and am sooo excited (not half as much as she). So, it went like this...

Rebecca : When you think of being with your husband right now, what are your first thoughts about that?

Dianna : (not her real name) I know I ought to want to but I just don't.

Rebecca : Would you say you only want to out of a sense of duty?

Dianna : Yes, I want to make my husband happy but I have got so much other stuff to think about.

Rebecca : Would you like to do some EFT around this? Maybe even allow yourself to get in the mood?

Dianna : Oh yes!

Rebecca : So, on a scale of 1 to 10 about how bad do you want to avoid sex right now?

Dianna : About a 9- I really don't care if I ever do it again.

Rebecca- OK here we go, folllow after me...

Even tho I don't care if I ever have sex again...

Even tho I only do it to keep my husband happy...

Even tho I feel dead inside...

Here Dianna stated that she was now down to about a 5. Then we did some positive asking and allowing-

Even tho I don't feel like it- I ask and allow my sex hormones to flow. (A full round of that)

Even tho I don't feel like it, I ask blood and oxygen to flow to my vagina and clitoris.

I ask my skin to get ready for love.

I ask my lips to be full and soft and ready to kiss.

I ask my fingertips to be ready to caress.

I ask my body to be ready for love.

I ask my vagina to be wet and hot and ready.

Dianna said she was down to zero on not feeling like it and that she was tingling all over and did indeed feel ready. She was so very amazed at the speed in which this happened.

Keep in mind that Dianna and I have worked together on different issues in the past and she does not have any traumatic abuse issues. She is a lady in her 50's who has had a complete hysterectomy and subsequent hormonal imbalances.

I finished the session with a meditation I created to awaken and tantalize all the five senses. She was very happy and ready to invite her husband home for lunch!

Rebecca Marina


Part 2--Isabelle

Dear Gary,

I have used EFT to address so many of my client's problems but nothing has thrilled me more than to be able to help women with sexual intimacy problems using EFT. The results my clients are having are truly heartwarming. This is Isabelle' s (not her real name) experience and she is thrilled to let me share her story in the hopes that EFT will help other women who may be having sexual difficulties.

It is important to note that one session of EFT will not cure all your sexual problems; however, when applied on a consistent basis wonderful improvements can occur. Try EFT on everything.

Rebecca: So Isabelle, if you tune in to how you feel about sex right now, what kind of words would you use?

Isabelle: Well, my sex life is non-existent, it's not in my thoughts or actions. I was celibate for a long time because of some problems my husband was having and now he wants to have sex again and I do not. I realize too that it is hard for me to allow myself any pleasure about anything in life. The only reason I want to improve my sex drive is because I am afraid my husband will get it somewhere else if I don't provide it.

Rebecca: Have you ever had a good sex life or allowed yourself to have pleasure?

Isabelle: Yes, I used to enjoy sex very much. I do miss it.

Rebecca: I am glad you are saying you miss it because it is better to try to improve something in your life for you and not just for someone else. What is your strongest feeling about sex right now?

Isabelle: I feel CONSTRICTED about sex and other things as well. I even get images of being physically constricted such as wearing a tight corset or having my feet bound like the ancient Chinese. I feel like I sabotage any attempts I make to have pleasure in my life. I have no problems doing nice things for other people but when it comes to me, I just can't do it.

Rebecca: Well, let's do some EFT around all these feelings you are describing.

Isabelle said her intensity rating on the feeling of CONSTRICTION was a 10+. Here are some of the setups we used.

Even though I have this constriction in my sex life, I love and accept myself.

Even though I feel constricted all over,

Even though I have a hard time opening to pleasure,

Even though I can't allow myself to open to pleasure.

We stopped and took another rating and we were still at a constriction level of 8. I asked Isabelle how she would prefer to feel and she said 'free and flowing' like a belly dancer. Isabelle had actually been a belly dancer earlier in her life and so this was a very concrete reference point for her.

We introduced the Choices (Dr Carrington) method.

Even though I still feel very constricted, I choose to allow myself to be free and flowing like a belly dancer.

Even though I may have been constricted in the past, I choose to be free and flowing and sensual like a belly dancer.

Even though I am constricted now, I choose to remember how it feels to be sensual.

Isabelle was now down to a 6. I explained that we would leave the constriction issue for a bit and go in another direction. Isabelle is 49 years old and has been having many hormonal fluctuations. We did EFT for the sexual hormones.

Even though my sex hormones have stopped working, I love and accept myself.

I am asking and allowing my sex hormones to rev it up,

I am asking my sex hormones to flow like honey,

I am asking my sex hormones to be balanced,

I am asking for just a little testosterone to be balanced

I release fear of my sex hormones flowing,

I release fear that I will become wildly sexual and out of control.

We then checked and Isabelle was all the way down to a CONSTRICTED feeling of 2.

We continued our session on different issues that came up like fear her husband would peak too quickly and leave her high and dry. We did more EFT about it being OK to take responsibility for her own orgasm.

It was a very satisfying session and we have more scheduled. Yes, you can do a whole lot in one session but a lifetime of sexual difficulties coupled with many relationship issues takes time and consistent EFT application.

I talked with Isabelle a few days later and she reported that sex was very much on her mind and that she had lots of tingling, awakened sensations going on. We will address more issues in our next session. She said she realized that part of what is holding her back is that she resents her husband for not helping her out with this problem. This should be a very rewarding session for her.

I urge all of you to try EFT on the sexual problems in your life. EFT has turned my whole personal experience around and I am so happy to share my results with others.

Till the next article, Rebecca Marina EFT-CC

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