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Articles & Ideas

Using EFT

Using EFT while you are in an argument

Important Note: This article was written prior to 2010 and is now outdated. Please use my newest advancement, Optimal EFT. It is more efficient, more powerful and clearly explained in my free e-book, The Unseen Therapist™.  Best wishes, Gary

Note: This article assumes you have a working knowledge of EFT. Newcomers can still learn from it but are advised to peruse our Free Gold Standard (Official) EFT Tutorial™ for a more complete understanding.

Hi Everyone,

Here's a clever, on the spot, use of for EFT by Sarajane Thomas. She says, "Since I have experienced this very sort of healing (from both sides of the fence), I know what I am describing here is possible and is one of those EFT one-minute wonders. So, the next time you're ready to insult a store clerk or you find somebody being unkind to you for apparently no reason, just remember the thumb and pinky finger work well together." Please know that other shortcut EFT points may work as well so you might wish to experiment.  I make some suggestions at the end which you may find helpful.

Hugs, Gary


By Sarajane Thomas

Have you ever been in the middle of a conversation and all of a sudden, something goes wrong? Perhaps the person you're chatting with has taken exception to something you said. Perhaps they might even become angry with you. If you should find yourself at the receiving end of this type of behavior, give EFT a chance to come to the rescue.

While you are giving the irritated person your attention and without missing a beat in the conversation, touch your thumb and little finger together on the left hand and start tapping them together. (In the middle of a ruckus, who is going to notice what you're doing with your arm down at your side?) At the same time you are tapping and looking at the man (let's call him Harry) while he's venting, you can start forming quick and simple set-up phrases in your mind and heart. Don't worry about getting the verbiage or the grammar just exactly right. Some simple set-up phrases might be:

Even though Harry is angry with me, I like myself.
Even though I don't know why Harry is acting this way, I respect myself.
Even though Harry is trying to hurt my feelings, I like the way I'm handling this situation.
Even though I may have caused Harry's anger, I still accept myself.

You will be amazed at how calm you become (as though you're in the eye of a storm). And you may feel suddenly as though you don't want to get angry in return with Harry. If you keep up the thumb and "pinky" tapping, you'll quickly feel the benefits spreading to Harry as well. Just keep on tapping. Focus on Harry. The tapping is certain to release some of his anger. Keep repeating short and simple reminder phrases. It's easier to do than you might imagine - right there in the midst of the anger and with a verbal conversation going on between the two of you.

Perhaps it happens the other way around and one day you find yourself becoming upset with Harry. At first you feel yourself becoming anxious and insecure. You actually want to insult this man and may even go ahead and make some inflammatory remarks to him. However, it doesn't take long before you realize what you have done, and Harry's anger is now boiling up to get into the act. Once you realize what you have started, just give the other person your genuine attention, tap and do some quick and simple set-up phrases while borrowed benefits does your bidding.

Even though I'm angry at Harry, I like myself.
Even though I don't know why I'm acting this way with Harry, I respect myself.
Even though I want to hurt Harry's feelings...
Even though I have spoken very harshly to Harry, I appreciate that I can tap to help us get over this anger.

Believe it or not, you can be speaking to the person about something and, at the same time, repeat these phrases in your mind without missing a beat. Tapping, in this instance, is like an act of apology. It changes your demeanor and your attitude. Your tongue becomes soothing rather than scalding. As the tapping benefits you, it inevitably spreads to the other person. Nothing can hold it back from doing so. What could have become an all-out confrontation calms down and all is well.

Since I have experienced this very sort of healing (from both sides of the fence), I know what I am describing here is possible and is one of those EFT one-minute wonders. So, the next time you're ready to insult a store clerk or you find somebody being unkind to you for apparently no reason, just remember the thumb and pinky finger work well together. Your presence of mind to remember to tap under these conditions can quickly bring peace to the other person as well as to yourself. It's all over and done with quickly, and you'll both wonder afterwards what started the whole thing in the first place.

Sarajane Thomas

GC COMMENT:  Yes, this sort of procedure can be very helpful for on-the-spot issues.  As Sarajane says, you don't necessarily need to use the thumb and pinky fingers.  Alternatively, you could drum your fingers on your knee, thigh or table top.  That would involve more meridians and increase the likelihood of success.  Further, you may not need to repeat the words to yourself.  You are obviously tuned into the problem in this heated conversation with "Harry" and thus repeating the words may be unnecessarily distracting.  Try it both ways and see which works best.

FOR MORE EFT HELP ...

Explore our newest advancement, Optimal EFT™, by reading my free e-book, The Unseen Therapist™. More efficient. More powerful.