Childhood

EFT and the devastation of childhood abuse

EFt Tapping Outdated ImageNote: This is one of 3,000 articles written prior to the updated Gold Standard (Official) EFT Tapping Tutorial™.  It provides practical uses for EFT Tapping and most EFT'ers should find it very helpful.  However, if your benefits are temporary or a more in-depth approach is needed, you are urged to (1) consult The Gold Standard EFT Tapping Tutorial, (2) Explore our newest advancement, Optimal EFT, by reading our free e-book, The Unseen Therapist, and/or (3) get help from a Certified EFT Practitioner.  

Hi Everyone,

Note how Georgia Fröhling from Germany assists this emotionally frail woman. Far too many people have been victimized by childhood abuse and have spent decades dealing with it. Fortunately, EFT can bring peace to replace this turmoil.

Hugs, Gary


By Georgia Fröhling

Dear Gary:

I would love to share this EFT story with you and the community, as it is the most spectacular healing I have ever experienced with this method.

A woman of 57 years called my practice for an appointment. She told me that she was at the end of her nerves and that she could go on no longer, being very controlled at the same time, almost detached from her emotional state by mere mental effort. I called her in to see what I could do for her, though I must admit that I was a little afraid. With such a state, there is almost every time a severe trauma behind it, and I am no psychologist and no trauma specialist (I am a natural healer).

She was really devastated and held up by sheer will when she came into my practice. She then told me her story. Inge, as I would like to call her for privacy reasons, had been raised in a very abusive family with a violent father and a mother who was a victim, dependent upon the father and never stopping what he did to his daughters. She and her sister had been sexually harassed by him, too, and her mother did nothing about that either.

Now, the fact was that her father had been sent to a hospital for some physical symptoms but showed signs of dementia, too. She had truly hoped that they would send him into a care facility, away from her mother, so that everybody would get some peace. The children had been called in most cases when her father acted violently towards her mother, and she could take no more of that. She then learned that, once in the hospital, he acted perfectly normal so that the doctors decided to send him home. This piece of news really destroyed her and put her in the state she was in when she came to see me.

In our first appointment, I felt that even TTT (Tearless Trauma Technique) would have been too much for her. So we tapped:

Even though I am held together by sheer will…

Even though I do not dare to cry…

She started crying and sobbing uncontrollably, but I felt that this was ok and did not intervene. I just handed her some handkerchiefs, tapped and talked for her and let her sob:

Even though I do not want to cry because I do not want to trouble anyone…(that’s what she said).

I am safe here …. I may cry as long as I wish, because no one is here that might be troubled for me (she was afraid to bother her husband and sister because they currently – and voluntarily – performed all necessary actions for her) … I am safe to cry and to let go, there is no one around who might be afraid.

After that, she was relieved a bit and we could go further. I told her right away that this was not the time and place to go for her childhood memories and that we would address them when their time had come.

Her mother had burdened her with her own problems since she was very small, so as a next exercise I did a visualisation with her where I had her imagine herself as a child, and she chose to be three years of age. She imagined her mom at approximately age thirty. I had her tap the KC point all the time, and I asked her numerous times if she felt safe. When she said no, I asked if she might need a guardian and gave her some examples, so she chose a big angel.

This made her safe enough to put all the burdens her mom had placed upon her shoulders in a bucket. The dirt, as she called it, was so much that the angel had to help her sweep it into the bucket. I then instructed her to hand it back to her mom with the words “I refuse to take your burden, please keep it”, selecting the words carefully to refuse the burden from the start and not to take it to herself. After that, we did an exercise so that she could store all unpleasant memories in a safe until the time she wanted to look at them.

In the second appointment, she appeared to be much different. She was more relaxed, more herself, and we dealt with different aspects:

Even though I feel so selfish because I decided not to deal with my parents any more and to leave the work to my husband and sister…

Even though I do not want my father to suffer… (she quickly realised that she still played daddy’s little girl and that this was another victim behaviour of hers; of course nobody wants the man to suffer, not even her, but he is taken care of, with or without her intervention).

Even though I feel bad because I exclude my parents from the good life I now have…

Finally, I had her forgive herself (not her father, for the time being), that she had allowed herself to be treated like this for so long. She cried a lot over this and finally agreed to forgive her parents for her own sake (grudges hardly ever hurt the person they are directed towards).

In our third appointment, she felt the same as I did: There might be no need at all to work on her abuse issues. They have moved back into the haze of time where they belong, and we agreed to work on them if they bothered her again.

We still have some sessions and some big issues before us, but I am convinced that with the help of EFT, she will finally become a happy woman.

GC COMMENT: Reducing some of these issue to specific events would likely create an even deeper result.

Gary, a thousand thanks!

Georgia Froehling

www.eft-behandlung.de

 

 

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