- Article Archive
- Cases
- Breasts, body parts and self image concerns
- Feeling Responsible For Someone Else's Death
- Persistence, hemorrhoids & Uncle Bugs
- Two EFT success stories: pain & the opinions of others
- Contempt and the effects of projection
- Greg Nicosia on tapping with intention
- Puppy dog, wetting one's pants, stress & a "no results" case
- Delayed reaction to EFT--back pain & rape trauma
- Intentionality on an airplane
- Inside a successful schizophrenia case
- Anaphylactic shock--"Before her eyes, the swelling began to go down."
- EFT, phone work and a business idea
- Migraines and a chocolate/cookies addiction
- Tapping with intention
- EFT for growing larger breasts
- Using EFT for Fertility.
- Phantom limb pain
- Using EFT with frail people
- No more "conversations in my head"
- Pyrophobia, fear of medicines and working with groups over the phone.
- Rapport in the prison system--Part I of III
- Dental gagging and accepting oneself
- Jason's motion sickness
- EFT and self image
- Apex problem--a response twist
- Emotional nose, burning house & golf questions
- A miscarriage and the recall of core issues.
- Tapping the finger points and the value of a hug
- Tapping variations
- "Harry's" case and breathing suggestion
- Followup on EFT in the prison system
- Physical problems and persistence
- Using EFT on past life issues
- Core issues, sexual pleasure and "The Sins of Eve"
- Headaches, substance sensitivities, phone work, dental fears and grief
- How to become "unstuck"
- "But it doesn't work for me...."
- Jet lag--tuning your time field
- Persistent tapping on several issues
- A question for digging deep
- Emotions, physical ailments and hidden issues
- More uses of EFT & a philosophical bent
- Using EFT to enhance education skills
- Mourning the mother she's slowly losing
- Tapping brought us closer and made me understand
- A bridge for "Dr. Fred's" beliefs
- Food repulsion, email phobia, golf & rejection
- Plugged up ears, suicide and delayed reactions
- Working together on vertigo
- A how-to guide for using EFT with couples.
- Henry's phrase points to core issues
- Using EFT for severe mental retardation
- Down Syndrome and EFT
- There's something lacking in my career
- Her sinuses opened like a floodgate
- Balance problem, corns & autism
- Bringing down the barriers to a better bedroom
- Enhancing performance as a metaphor for life issues
- Mr Persistence, EFT and a brain tumor
- A teeny(?) and delightful success
- Business owner moves his business to the next level.
- Food repulsion: Green furry things and yucky tomatoes!
- An EFT "Pre-Beginner" reports success
- Warts
- Creative reframing: Satan to God
- Hip replacement, magic and miracles
- EFT with a mentally retarded patient
- Dying gently
- Lactose intolerance--including a 6 month follow-up--see below
- Thought for the day
- "Bedside EFT" for patient relief in a hospital setting
- Expensive Emotions
- Niki LaMont on depression, pain and a water phobia
- Guilt over terminating a marriage
- Calming down a suicidal client
- The freedom to sing
- When a prisoner won't disclose the issue
- When pets have to pee...
- ...And he cried on my shoulder
- Hospice care and EFT
- How do I know the right words to say when I'm tapping?
- A builder with psoriasis & little things
- EFT clears eczema.
- Loneliness and many, many aspects
- An uncontrollably sobbing client--"my mother didn't love me"
- A problem with Happy Birthday
- Expert golfers, EFT and comfort zones
- Men only want one thing
- Tinkie said, "I don't fit in"
- Cholesterol and EFT
- Free to pee
- Programming dreams with EFT
- When you gotta go...
- Critical Incident Stress Debriefing
- Insight--"I'm terrified I'm going to be like my father"
- Sales performance
- Alan--a mentally retarded client
- EFT "homework" and other messages
- What would love do here?
- Emergency uses for EFT
- A blind man's erection problem
- Fasting??--try it on everything
- Using EFT on Paranoid Schizophrenia
- EFT helps trumpeter blow his own horn
- Clients with low energy--(Note: many suggestions from our members follow this message)
- Using "Setup Emphasis" for gout and other stubborn issues.
- Pulse rate improvement: From 130 to 90 in 1 minute
- Crohn's disease, gas, dental pain and a message from Albert Einstein
- Intentional EFT, enhancing romance and chewing cold things
- EFT on Schizophrenia
- Alzheimer's, "Absent tapping," & other experiences
- EFT and circumcision
- Low libido
- Suicidal client helped over the phone
- Press Releases
- EFT in the News
- Stories
- Weight Loss
- Editorials
- Frequently Asked Questions
- How do I use EFT for___________?
- When EFT relieves pain, does it mask the pain and thus thwart the ability for pain to signal danger?
- I'm used to affirmations being stated in the positive. Why does the EFT Setup language focus on the negative? What if I used positive statements instead?
- Does it matter whether or not the EFT practitioner is skeptical?
- Are there suggested guidelines for professionals regarding an Informed Consent Statement?
- How do I apply EFT for performance issues?
- Are EFT's results due to either placebo effects or distraction?
- Using EFT for Epilepsy and seizures
- Can EFT cause a client to "feel worse?"
- How do I introduce EFT to skeptics?
- Are there any problems using EFT for pregnancy?
- Are there any negative side effects or abreactions?
- How do I handle Hand-Me-Down EFT?
- How do I choose the language to use while doing EFT?
- Can we do EFT surrogately or through intention? If so do we need permission?
- Can I be effective with "just the basics?"
- How do I find a client's "hidden issues?"
- What procedures might be taken if a client is undergoing a medical emergency?
- When it doesn't work....???
- How do I handle the "Big One?"
- How does EFT differ from Thought Field Therapy (TFT)?
- What's a good way for newcomers to apply EFT to themselves?
- Why do you sell it so inexpensively?
- What do I do when the clients stop tapping even though they have had substantial success with EFT?
- How do I find answers to my EFT questions?
- How do you help a "non-feeling" client?
- What do I say while performing EFT?
- Can EFT be combined with other techniques?
- How long do the results last?
- EFT is obvious! So why wasn't it discovered many decades ago?
- Does EFT work on______?
- Fear
- Humor
- Annual Neologism Contest
- Army Insurance
- TRIBUTE TO BOB HOPE- Part I
- Computer Haikus
- Calories That Don't Count
- Commuting Hazards
- Winning the Lottery
- Why Indeed ...?
- A Well-Planned Retirement
- A Little Mixed Up
- Fifty Fun Things to do in an Elevator
- The Spanish Computer
- The Bank Robber
- Colorful Shipwreck
- Accuracy!
- WHEN INSULTS HAD CLASS
- Creative Definitions - Part 3
- Now That
- COURTROOM BLOOPERS
- Baseball in Heaven
- HMO
- Thirty Lines to Make You Smile
- Hasty Headlines
- MEMO
- Ancient Artifact?
- A Moral Lesson
- And that
- Is It Better To Be A Jock Or A Nerd?
- BIZARRE DRIVING LAWS - Part 2
- Funny Sayings - Part 1
- Computer Help Desk
- Life Support
- Women in Leather
- GREETINGS AND BEST WISHES FROM A LAW FIRM
- PRAYING FOR PEACE
- Bad Weather
- Chemistry Final Exam
- The Four Stages of Life
- Airline Maintenance
- BIKERS
- HOLLYWOOD SQUARES - THE GOOD OLD DAYS
- Deep Voice
- HOLLYWOOD SQUARES - THE GOOD OLD DAYS - PART 5
- The Definition of Barbecuing
- Not My Job
- On the Phone with with Technical Support
- TRIBUTE TO BOB HOPE - Part II
- Computer Haikus
- Calories That Don't Count
- Congressional Mugging
- Kids and Proverbs - Part 1
- Why Indeed ...?
- Dear God
- A New Teacher
- Finally! Answers About Marriage
- Talking Dog
- Signs & Notices
- Beethoven's Grave
- Adoption
- Amazingly Simple Home Remedies
- The Perfect Man
- Marriage Names
- A TEST FOR PROFESSIONALS
- Beer, Fishing, Golf and Sex
- How To Lie To The Bathroom Scale
- Twelve Step Recovery Plan
- Hasty Headlines
- Estate Planning Basics
- Astrological Light Bulbs
- Kindergarten Wisdom
- And that
- The Old Golfer
- BIZARRE DRIVING LAWS - Part 3
- Funny Sayings - Part 2
- Computer Swallowed Grandma
- Martha Stewart Holiday Schedule
- Strange Laws - Part 1
- 24 SIGNS YOU MIGHT BE CANADIAN
- OLDER and WISER
- The Bartender
- Circulatory Exam
- Success
- Survivors
- BILL GATES BUYS A HOUSE
- Funny Sayings
- Proper Diskette Usage and Care
- Only in Merry Old England
- Punctuation Is Everything
- TRIBUTE TO BOB HOPE - Part III
- Computer Haikus
- Camping Trip
- Consultant
- Kids and Proverbs - Part 2
- Why Indeed ...?
- In Memoriam
- Accident report
- The Fire Truck
- Signs That Technology Has Taken Over Your Life
- Signs & Notices
- Goofy Conversions
- Addicted to Coffee
- Professional Advice
- The Bottle of Wine
- Marriage Names
- PICABO
- How to Give the Cat a Pill
- Humor From the Church
- Understanding Engineers
- Hasty Headlines
- Dad Math
- At the Inn...
- A Christian Upbringing
- Have You Heard?
- Scared Straight...For Math
- Do you REALLY need email??
- Funny Sayings - Part 3
- Computers and Companies
- Microsoft vs. GM
- Strange Laws - Part 2
- THE GOOD HUSBAND
- THOSE WERE THE DAYS - Part 1
- Baseball Quote
- City Slicker
- Airline Travel: The Next Generation
- George Carlin's Views on Aging
- BIRTHDAY SURPRISE
- Funny Sayings - Part 7
- If A Dog Were Your Teacher
- Politically Correct Holiday Greeting
- A Rope Went into a Bar...
- How Smart Is Your Right Foot?
- WORDS TO LIVE BY
- Canine Complex
- Cuff Links
- Kids and Proverbs - Part 3
- THE ARROGANT INSPECTOR
- The 'Middle Wife'
- Aging Perspective
- Flight Announcements
- The Sex of a Fly
- Honest Advertising
- Intermission Hijinks
- After-Thanksgiving Poem
- AN ODE TO ENGLISH PLURALS
- Getting Older
- Marriage Names
- A FROG STORY
- Cheap Therapy
- Husband 101
- Having Fun in Wal Mart
- Hasty Headlines
- Time Out
- A Change of Vows
- Farmer
- How Banks Work
- Stern Sibling
- TALKIN
- Funny Sayings - Part 4
- Creation Retold
- Having Trouble with Microsoft Word
- Strange Laws - Part 3
- ITALIAN PASTA DIET
- THOSE WERE THE DAYS - Part 2
- Bathroom Sign
- Class Reunion
- THE LAWS OF INCONVENIENCE
- Calling God
- THE BLARNEY STONE
- Funny Sayings - Part 8
- Dog Thoughts
- The Perfect Husband
- Product Labels
- Toys for Today
- What I've Learned by Having Boys
- The C.E.O.
- Cured
- Kids and Proverbs - Part 4
- DADDY, HOW WAS I BORN???
- My First Mammogram
- Are You Ready For Children?
- For Those Who Need a Chuckle
- The Helicopter
- Give a Man a Fish...
- Band Insect
- Afternoon Rounds
- AN ODE TO ENGLISH PLURALS - PART 2
- Write it Down?
- Marriage Names
- WHY GOD MADE MOMS
- Chuckles
- Are You An Internet Addict?
- Washing Your Cat
- Speeding Ticket
- The Concept of Marriage
- The 84-year-old Newlywed
- The Company Picnic
- Eternal Devotion
- 25 Signs You've Grown Up
- SAFARI SURVIVAL
- Funny Sayings - Part 5
- Dear Dad
- Miracle
- Swapping Professional Secrets
- THE FINAL WORD ON NUTRITION AND HEALTH
- YEP
- Cakes and Ale
- Classified Ads
- THE LAWS OF INCONVENIENCE
- A Bed Near The Window
- NAME THAT BOAT
- Monastery Life
- BY THE BOOK
- Funny Sayings - Part 9
- Why Dogs Can't Use Computers
- Politically Correct About Men
- Product Labels
- Job Competition
- What I've Learned by Having Boys
- EYEGLASSES
- Cyclic Number
- Kids and Proverbs - Part 5
- COURTROOM BLOOPERS
- Monkey Business
- Bad Puns
- For Those Who Take Life Too Seriously
- The Human Race is Doomed
- Photogenic?
- RESTAURANT MATH
- RESERVATIONS OF AN AIRLINE AGENT
- Quick Jokes
- Detective Mom
- A Novel Approach to Saving Money
- WHY GOD MADE MOMS
- How to Clean the Toilet
- Internet Police
- Why Learn English Part 1
- Where Is God ?
- Phrases from the 50's - Part 1
- New Year's Resolutions -- Over Time
- Car Warning
- I Think I Need a Computer
- DINNER INVITATION
- QUALITY ASSURANCE
- HOLLYWOOD SQUARES - THE GOOD OLD DAYS (PART 1)
- Dear Bubba
- Missing
- Good Communication
- MAN
- YEP
- Call Center
- Classified Ads
- THE LAWS OF INCONVENIENCE
- Classified Ads
- Fried Eggs
- Why Indeed ...?
- The Talking Dog
- The best road rage!
- Eating Oreos
- Signage
- Product Labels
- Skydiver
- Most ridiculous British laws:
- WHEN INSULTS HAD CLASS
- Creative Definitions - Part 1
- Mourning the Mayonnaise
- COURTROOM BLOOPERS
- Comments made in the year 1955!
- A Barbie we can relate to
- Fresh New Perspectives
- The Male Perspective
- Pull Over!
- Dalmation Duties
- Airline Food
- Painting the Porch
- Aging Gracefully
- Animal Super Bowl
- WHY GOD MADE MOMS
- The Clergyman
- A Kitten's Prayer
- Why Learn English Part 2
- DAILY THOUGHTS FROM DOGS AND CATS
- Phrases from the 50's - Part 2
- The Minister and the Funeral
- Case Closed
- Having a Bad Day
- Airline Maintenance
- A DRY TOWN
- HOLLYWOOD SQUARES - THE GOOD OLD DAYS - PART 2
- Deep Observations on Life
- Out of the Mouths of Babes
- Wash. Biol. Surv.
- WOMEN OVER 40
- CHASING RABBITS
- Call Policy
- THE HISTORY OF WIRELESS
- Calories That Don't Count
- Cold Cream
- The Mountain Man and the Army
- Why Indeed ...?
- University Safety Committee
- 80% Agreement
- The English Schoolteacher
- Let Sleeping Dogs Lie
- Two-Cow Philosophy
- Untold Riches
- Abbott and Costello meet Windows 95
- WHEN INSULTS HAD CLASS
- Creative Definitions - Part 2
- The Price of Good Health
- COURTROOM BLOOPERS
- Bargaining with God
- A Good Explanation
- The Man I Marry
- Hasty Headlines
- New Business Model
- Amish and Elevator
- A Pain in the Leg
- And that
- Three Dogs...and a Collie
- BIZARRE DRIVING LAWS - Part 1
- Coming Mergers
- Life Before the Computer
- The Wisdom of a Witch
- GOLF GAME
- Phrases from the 50's - Part 3
- Bad Day
- CEO Blunder
- Great Truths That Little Children Have Learned
- Airline Maintenance
- BEING COOL
- HOLLYWOOD SQUARES - THE GOOD OLD DAYS - PART 3
- Deep Thoughts
- Near Death Experience
- Walk A Mile
- AN INTERESTING PHILOSOPHY
- Inspiration
- A Drunk Fell in a Hole
- Million Dollar Lesson
- SLOW DANCE
- The Loving Picture that will never leave your memory
- Secret of Success
- Good Corn
- Positive Side of Life
- Real Heroes
- Before It's Too Late
- EXPLANATION OF GOD
- The Mustard Seed
- The little boy with a bad temper
- How Do You Think?
- Stray Cat
- Attitude determines everything
- The Fisherman and The Investment Banker
- The Trouble Tree
- Whispers
- I Tried to Climb the Mountain Today
- Letter From a Farm Kid
- Whiners
- Crayola Bomb
- The Sneeze
- Eating the Cookie
- Nice Kids
- Explanation of God by an 8 year old boy
- AN EXERCISE IN GRATITUDE - Part 1
- Defining Success
- Great Opportunity
- Positive Thinking
- A Sioux Indian Story
- The Best Medicine
- GOSSIP
- Miss Isabel
- Boy Wanted
- I Love You
- The Carpenter
- A lesson in attitude
- Customer Service From Heaven
- Paid In Full
- The 30 Second Quiz
- Count Your Blessings
- Lincoln and Failure
- Wisdom from Oscar
- Twenty Four Crowded Hours
- A Newborn's Conversation with God
- Embassy of Hope
- No Matter What Happens
- WHAT IS LOVE? (Part 1)
- AN EXERCISE IN GRATITUDE - Part 2
- Forsaken?
- There is beauty in everything
- A Group of Frogs
- The Race
- Ugly
- Does it Still Serve a Purpose?
- THE MEANING OF LIFE
- Time to Learn
- A Builder or a Wrecker?
- The Impossible Dream
- The Horseman
- The Balloon Man
- Optimism
- Heaven and Hell
- The Seven Wonders of the World
- True Story of Courage and Love
- The Lonely Road
- Wisdom
- This is What Love is All About
- The Value of Time
- The Weight of a Burden
- He Failed His Way To The Top
- Not The Critic
- WHAT IS LOVE? (Part 2)
- AN EXERCISE IN GRATITUDE - Part 3
- The Emperor's Seed
- Beauty tips
- Handwriting On The Wall
- Raised as a Chicken
- Mom - Job Description
- Distance Never Separates
- THREE DAYS TO SEE
- When You Thought I Wasn't Looking
- A Butterfly Hovers
- The Jag
- The Ones Who Care
- To Have Succeeded
- Letter To My Grandchildren
- What do Angels Look Like?
- Covering All the Bases
- Love software
- World's Greatest Psychotherapist
- The Obstacle in Our Path
- The World's Most Communicative Disease
- Strongest Dad in the World
- Children Learn What They Live
- The Final Exam
- Now and Beyond
- WHAT IS LOVE? (Part 3)
- ANGELS IN THE POST OFFICE
- Sioux Indian Story
- The best day of my life
- Happiness
- The Reflection
- The Joy of Gratitude
- Don't Go To Bed
- Good People
- And This Too Shall Pass
- By Changing...
- Jars of Clay
- To Build A Bridge
- The Dates that Matter
- The Precious Gift
- State Of The World Message
- Cross My Heart
- Love and the papers everyone kept
- The Daffodil Principle
- Lucky's Greatest Treasure
- You are so beautiful to me
- The Cab Ride I'll Never Forget
- A Sweet Lesson in Humanity
- The Firth of Forth Bridge
- On Failure
- No Matter What Happens
- AN ENLIGHTENED PERSPECTIVE - Part 1
- Keep Your Dream
- The best time of my life
- Healing Garden
- Rich or Poor?
- That's all I remember!
- The Elderly Caretaker
- The Wise Sage
- Miguel's Poem
- Capt. Laurent Gourley...8-6-69
- Just Be
- To Risk
- Misfits
- My Resignation
- My Comfort Zone
- Determination
- The Magic of Hope
- 57 CENTS
- Broken Wing
- Infecting the World
- Flying
- Others at their best
- Are you God
- AN ENLIGHTENED PERSPECTIVE - Part 2
- Roses of Life
- Better Far to Risk A Fall
- Here I Grow Again
- Shake It Off and Step Up
- The Archer and the Arrow
- Look Mommy
- Start With Yourself
- Attitude
- Cerebral Palsy and a flower inside a cocoanut shell
- Kitten From Heaven
- To Track Down My Dream
- Creating Destiny
- Making Sandcastles
- You Sure Are Lucky...
- Dig a Little Deeper
- May You Have...
- The Angel on Hwy 109
- Be Thankful
- Five Short Chapters on Change
- Follow the Leader
- Point of View
- Mean old Moms
- Unforgiveness
- AN ENLIGHTENED PERSPECTIVE - Part 3
- If You Were
- The Boy and the Worm
- House of 1000 Mirrors
- The Star Polisher
- Are Your Potatoes Heavy
- Magic Mommy Kisses
- A Determined Spirit
- The Magical Tablecloth
- Challenged
- Lesson
- Which one are you?
- Asking God
- The Pickle Jar
- Cookies
- Research
- Self-administered EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) in individuals with fibromyalgia: a randomized trial
- The Treatment of Combat Trauma in Veterans Using EFT
- Energy Psychology: a review of the preliminary evidence
- Energy psychology in disaster relief
- The effects of EFT on long-term psychological symptoms
- Neurophysiological Indicators of EFT Treatment Of Post-Traumatic Stress
- Assessment of the Emotional Freedom Technique: An Alternative Treatment for Fear - The Waite & Holder Study
- Evaluation of a Meridian-Based Intervention, Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT), for Reducing Specific Phobias of Small Animals
- Studies Accepted in Peer Reviewed Journals
- Pilot Study of EFT, WHEE and CBT for Treatment of Test Anxiety in University Students
- Psychological Symptom Change in Veterans After Six Sessions of Emotional freedom Techniques (EFT); An Observational Study
- Veterans: Finding their way home with EFT--an observational study
- The Effect of Progressive Muscular Relaxation and Emotional Freedom Techniques on Test Anxiety in High School Students: A Randomized Controlled Trial
- Clinical Story of a 6-Year-Old Boy's Eating Phobia; An Integrated Approach
- The Neurochemistry of Counterconditioning: Acupressure Desensitization in Psychotherapy
- The Effect of a Brief EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) Self-Intervention on Anxiety, Depression, Pain and Cravings in Healthcare Workers
- Change Is Possible: EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) with Life-Sentence and Veteran Prisoners at San Quentin State Prison
- Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) For Traumatic Brain Injury
- Energy Psychology in Rehabilitation: Origins, Clinical Applications, and Theory
- Thought Field Therapy and its derivatives: rapid relief of mental health problems through tapping on the body
- The Effect of EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) on Athletic Performance: A Randomized Controlled Blind Trial
- Theoretical and Methodological Problems in Research on Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) and Other Meridian Based Therapies
- Rapid Treatment of PTSD: Why Psychological Exposure with Acupoint Tapping May Be Effective
- Six Trauma Imprints Treated with Combination Intervention: Critical Incident Stress Debriefing and Thought Field Therapy (TFT) or Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT)
- Studies Presented at Professional Conferences
- The Effect of EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) on Psychological Symptoms: A Limited Replication
- The Effect of EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) on Psychological Symptoms in Addiction Treatment
- The effect of an energy psychology intervention (EFT) versus diaphragmatic breathing on specific
- World Trade Center Tower 2 Survivor: EP Treatment of Long-term PTSD:
- Psychological Trauma in Veterans using EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques): A Randomized Controlled Trial
- Does Prolonged Exposure Need to Hurt in Order to Help? Exploring Two Alternatives
- Measuring Physiological Markers of Emotional Trauma: A Randomized Controlled Trial of Mind-Body Therapies
- Other Studies and Experiments
- Clear evidence that our emotions affect our body--in this case, dramatic changes in the blood
- The results of Carol Look's eyesight experiment
- Articles evidencing the existence of energy meridians
- EFT improves Minerals, Amino Acids & Vitamins
- Before and after photos of Rouleaux--"blood cell clumping"
- An Objective Experiment on the Use of EFT for Depression
- EFT for Libido: Study Results Summarized -- 80% report an improvement of 50% or more
- An EFT study: Reducing anxiety in dental patients with EFT
- Preliminary Report of the First Large-Scale Study of Energy Psychology
- Cases
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Article Archive
Cases
How do I know the right words to say when I'm tapping?
Important Note: This article was written prior to 2010 and is now outdated. Please use my newest advancement, Optimal EFT. It is more efficient, more powerful and clearly explained in my free e-book, The Unseen Therapist™. Best wishes, Gary
Hi Everyone,
David Lake, MD (from Australia) takes us on an insightful and creative journey into the language possibilities within EFT. Please note his innovative method of magnifying the issue (from both positive and negative directions) while tapping. I've done this myself many times (you will see it on our DVDs) and it often produces substantial cognitive shifts, belief changes, new perspectives and the like. Those who want to master the fine points of EFT will find David's message invaluable.
Hugs, Gary
This question is perennial. To me it indicates that the mind is concerned about getting the instructions correct (and worried about getting them 'wrong'...). You might not need too many words at all! While EFT is robust and forgiving as a technique, it's easy to forget that it's a body-energy technique and not strictly a psychological one.
Thus, the emotion of the issue fills your system regardless of how the mind processes the problem, and this might be why focus and persistent tapping bring so many positive and varied results. I find it better to tap on body sensations and reactions than to get over-concerned about labelling every feeling. I am also interested in bringing the maximum leverage to the use of EFT by concentrating its effect on the most intense aspects of the dysfunction.
One of the best ways to do this is to emphasise and exaggerate the negative. This is important if you believe that EFT works its wonders by harmonizing the disruptions in our 'reactive' emotional system. I have also found that a light-hearted therapeutic focus on the dark side of personality and life can bring disproportionate relief, ironic acceptance, laughter, and compassion--and EFT will facilitate the unique alchemy of transformation. Steve Wells and I have been investigating this approach toward the negative over recent years in our Energy work (it is not fair to assume that his therapeutic imagination is more bizarre or surreal than mine).
This is a composite example of how I would do this in treating a relationship issue. The presenting problem is the frustration of a wife who 'can't trust' her husband, as a result of repeated broken promises. The couple sits together in a counselling session, both have learned EFT, and it is her turn to talk about her grievance. I ask her to tap on facial points whenever she feels intense about the situation, as it is important to take up every opportunity to 'treat as you go', and to end such a session with as many sequences of tapping completed as comfortably possible. I also ask the husband, this time, to tap for relief, if he needs to, while she talks--but to be silent.
She says: "He's always saying one thing and doing another...I get my hopes up but he never follows through. He lies! I'm sick of it!". Now I ask permission to go further with this, and request that she look into her husband's eyes while she follows my actions and repeats my words.
I say, for the three 'set-up' statements:
"Even though you lie to me...and let me down...and dash my hopes...part of me still loves you."
"Even though you say one thing and do another, I do my best to handle you."
"Even though you never follow through...and I'm really sick of it...and maybe there is no answer to this... I'm going to find an answer if I can."
Now she taps on the 7 basic shortcut points while saying: "You lie. You let me down. I can't stand it. I can't stand you. I have no hope. Maybe we can't make it. I don't know what to do."
While these statements are intuitive, they also pace the wife's experience, and she knows from my inquiries after the sequences that she can adjust their accuracy if she wants to (instant feedback). I find that all such statements have come up at one time in the mind of a distressed spouse ('speaking the unspeakable' according to Frank Farrelly, originator of Provocative Therapy). Typically by using the paradox of worsening the situation, strong emotion surfaces and releases. She would typically cry or get angry.
I now say: "Keep on tapping around the points" (Very important to keep tapping with strong feelings, as this is the antidote). Now I switch to the body: "If you had to name a place in your body where these feelings might collect, where would it be?" The answer might be over the heart. I say: "Put one hand over that place and focus all your attention underneath--as if those feelings have a shape and you could connect with that shape, and touch it". We keep tapping in silence so as not to interrupt the process with words, and to give some time and space to the obvious hurt.
Sometimes this can take a few minutes. Often I will ask if I can help by doing some of the tapping for her, and if the answer is 'yes', I will use the hand points (and wrist yin/yang meeting points); Gary has done this tapping for the client consistently in all his EFT trainings and it is a beautiful gesture and assistance in the right hands.
When things settle down I check the body sensations and their intensity, and repeat some sequences on 'chest emotion' or 'heart feeling' if necessary. It's not vital to get such intensities down to zero as they represent a big picture which is unfolding, so aspects of the problem pop up in many guises, and you deal with them naturalistically (if not logically).
I like to emphasise the bizarre aspects of loving and hating someone simultaneously (the 'good' partner and the 'bad' partner), and making molehills into mountains so that eventually even the client finds it hard to agree that they have teamed up with the 'worst person in the world', or that their 'shocking bad judgement' in saying 'yes' to him means that they are a 'very slow learner'!
A healthy disputing commences, which I can humorously refute, as if I am on the side of her nightmare and as if I agree that it's really too hard or hopeless (or whatever she said when she was steamed up). I would tap on either side of the belief system, emphasizing the good or the bad, but I would exaggerate that polarity to an uncomfortable degree, using a cartooning or lampooning irony if possible. This is a slippery situation for the client to respond to.
For maximum effect she can follow a sequence of tapping where the good and the bad are presented alternately with each point! The 'good' news will usually have an echo in the client's belief structure, which is a disbelieving or cynical opposite response, while the 'bad' news is treated anyway in the usual manner. A lot of negativity is processed very quickly with such accelerated confusion. That confusion exists anyway in the love/hate dichotomy but, after EFT, it settles to tolerable levels.
While doing the setup, I would have the wife say (looking at her partner): "Although part of me hates what you do, I don't hate you--but I do sometimes, and I hate feeling like that; and even if all that is true, I accept myself deeply and completely... I accept myself, even though it's very hard to accept myself as a wife when I have these hateful feelings... I love and forgive myself even though it might be a very long time before I'll do that for you, considering your track record."
Now she taps on the 7 points, moving to the next point with each phrase: "I love you. I don't love you. I hate you. Part of me loves you. Part of me hates you. I only love the good you. I really hate the bad you."
We progress in the session by testing the original propositions and complaints for emotional intensity. If things have shifted to positive and life-affirming directions, a guaranteed way to further the work required is to get the husband to proffer some of his favourite excuses or rationalizations. With the wife's response you will find more work to be done! Later in therapy the husband has a turn, and the couple can do all of the above strategies together, simultaneously or sequentially, straight or paradoxically. Are we having fun yet?
Of course as the therapist you need excellent rapport and loving kindness in your empathic resonance. I also think you need to be able to tolerate the ambiguity and ambivalence involved in 'making the problem worse' in a creative and loving way. For some, this emphasis would go against the grain of positive thinking (or the pursuit of happiness in some countries). It might even be unconstitutional.
Flash: This works! You can even do it yourself for your own private reactive problems.
With my best intentions,
David Lake
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