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Article Archive

Humor

COURTROOM BLOOPERS

COURTROOM BLOOPERS – Part 1

These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.

 

ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?

 WITNESS: No, I just lie there.

 _______________________________

 ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth?

 WITNESS: July 18th.

 ATTORNEY: What year?

 WITNESS: Every year.

 _____________________________________

 ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?

 WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

 ______________________________________

 ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?

 WITNESS: Yes.

 ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?

 WITNESS: I forget.

 ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?

_____________________________________

 ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you?

 WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.

 ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you?

 WITNESS: Forty-five years.

 _____________________________________

 

Source Unknown

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