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Articles & Ideas

Core Issues

Iris finds her own core issue

Important Note: This article was written prior to 2010 and is now outdated. Please use my newest advancement, Optimal EFT. It is more efficient, more powerful and clearly explained in my free e-book, The Unseen Therapist™.  Best wishes, Gary

Note: This article assumes you have a working knowledge of EFT. Newcomers can still learn from it but are advised to peruse our Free Gold Standard (Official) EFT Tutorial™ for a more complete understanding.

Hi Everyone,

Finding core issues can be a real art ... but they often just show up if we are persistent with EFT. Read on as Iris Lahad from Israel uses persistence to finally discover what was behind her father's statement of "That's impossible."

Hugs, Gary

By Iris Lahad

Hi Gary,

This is my first time writing you although I have been playing with EFT as a tool for myself and my work for some years.  I felt you might be interested in my experience of combining meditation with EFT.

I had a very moving and profound experience recently.  I am on the verge of a big project.  I was meditating and merging with my divine self to get insights on what might be holding me back and what is the best way to deal with this.  I received a clear answer as to the specific issues and was told to use EFT - tap on them.  I wrote them all down and started working on them.  There were a few small ones which I had dealt with quickly.  Looking back I can see now they were the preparation for the big one coming on.

The big one - the initial story: I was in 1st grade and my parents and I were at my grandparents' home.  It was a tiny apartment and we were all in the same room.  I was reading a book.  It was probably one of the first times I read a whole book by myself.  I finished reading and as I was putting the book down I said, "I finished reading the book".

My father turned around to me and said, "That's impossible.  You couldn't have read it so fast, you probably only looked at the pictures".  I answered him, "No, I READ the words and I finished reading".  He was seriously doubting my words and to check my credibility tested me on the details.  I knew all the details and answered him correctly.

This story did not just pop into my awareness; I had known it all my life.  I had worked on it several times before too.  Yet since it did come up in the meditation I decided to explore it more.  I played with "Telling the story" technique.  As soon as I started I became intense and did a round on relieving my tension.  I continued and came to the part where my father said: "that's impossible".  My intensity rose dramatically.  I checked on what I was feeling and realized I felt as if I had been hit on the head.  The blow was so strong it broke me.  I started the setup:

Even though that saying was like a blow on the head and I felt like it broke me I now choose to let my higher self be creative in finding another reality where I was loved and accepted unconditionally.

I did one round on the blow, a round on the breaking feeling, a round on my positive choice and a final round alternating between the setup and the positive choice.  I felt the shifts within me. But going back to my father's statement - my intensity rose again.  I merged with my divine self to get more insights on the matter.  I saw how my father doubted me when I spoke of what I did or my achievement.  I saw how I accepted that as truth and let it be the writing on my walls.  I also saw how those beliefs were in my thought field throughout my entire life, affecting me by creating again and again situations that verified this truth for me.  So I elaborated on the setup:

Even though my father doubted me when I told him what I did - my achievement; and then tested me on it, and I believed him and accepted his action as the truth, and let those beliefs manipulate my life, I now choose to let my higher self be creative in finding another reality where my father was able to accept me totally.

The 2nd and 3rd time I added: I forgive my father for acting from his limited awareness, I forgive myself for believing him and taking that as the truth of my existence - letting it affect me all my life, I forgive that belief for manipulating me throughout my entire life. Long setup!

I did one whole round for each of the aspects of the setup, one round for my positive choice and a final round alternating between the setup and my positive choice.  I felt huge shifts going on throughout me on all levels.  But when I checked my father's statement: “That's impossible", my intensity rose again

I merged with my divine self to get more insights.  As I came out I was thrown into such an emotional state that I tapped myself 3 consecutive rounds without saying a thing.  I knew I had come upon something super strong.  When my tears subsided I merged again with my divine self to learn more.

I was now in the fog of my deep inner realms of my subconscious.  These issues have never been near the light of my conscious awareness - never!  At the time of the initial event, the first-grader me had not the awareness, tools nor the abilities to know what was really happening, and definitely not the ability to deal with it.  I felt I was excavating emotions that I had to name and define in order to acknowledge them and thus be able to deal with them.  Then it dawned upon me.

I had realized that the true attacker was not the father I had known, but his inner child.  This was a fearful child with very little self esteem.  In fact his self esteem was so low, he had to try to put me down in order to make himself feel better.  I knew he was a relatively slow reader so the fact that I read quickly felt threatening to his inner child.  The setup:

Even though I felt my reality shattered as my strong father became a fearful little child attacking me, and I believed him that this is how it is supposed to be … that strong men attacking me have the right to do it because they are actually fearful kids who are trying to improve their self esteem by putting down others, especially me … I now choose to let my higher self create another reality for me where I had a strong father who loved and accepted me unconditionally.

I added the forgiveness to my father for acting from his limited self awareness.  Forgiveness to myself for acting from my limited awareness thus adopting that belief and letting it rule my life.  I thanked the belief for protecting me when I needed that protection and forgiveness to the belief for haunting me throughout my entire life.

I did one whole round for each of the aspects of the setup, one round for my positive choice and a final round alternating between the setup and my positive choice.

They were very long rounds and I was poofed.  I lay down on my couch and asked for divine healing.  I felt my whole body being recalibrated and surrendered to my guides.  Ten minutes later I was fine again and went to check THE STATEMENT as it now became an entity of its own.  Well, my intensity rose again.  Oh no!  Is there no end to this?  Am I ever going to get to the core of this?  I merged with my divine self knowing there was more excavating, digging, sorting and of course defining my findings.  Living in a country of many layers - Israel, I guess I have many layers too.

I merged with my divine self and again came out very emotional.  While tapping silently I gathered and sorted out the emotions.  There was shock.  Watching my father shattering into fragments and becoming a puny child threw me into shock.  There were different fears there.  If my strong protective father is only a fearful child, who is out there to attack me, then who is going to protect me?

There were aspects of anger.  This was not part of the deal.  I myself was still small and I needed a strong father, I was promised a strong father and this is betraying me.  There were aspects of resentment too on the above issues.

Again I made a long and elaborate setup (made it up as I went along because I was still in a rather confused state).  I added my forgiveness as before.  I gave a whole round to each specific aspect and to the positive choice which was the same as the round before.  By the end I was so tired I lay down again to receive healing.  I felt my whole brain being rewired and my body recalibrating on top of what was done before. 

Some moments later I checked the statement again.  And my intensity went up again - a true test for my patience!  And I like to do things fast!  But I am also meticulous so I was going to the end.  I merged with my divine self for more insights.  I had found it fun in a way - as strange as that may sound regarding the powerful issues I was dealing with.  Although there were strong emotions coming up, I was flowing with them.  Once they passed away I forgot about them and went on.

What were going to be my new excavations?  Seeing my father as the fearful child with such limited self esteem, I knew he was asking me for protection.  (I want to add that all of these insights were the ones I had now.  I knew that the child me of back then had no conscious awareness whatsoever of any of these things.  I also knew that I was now dealing with unconscious or telepathic communication that was going on between me and my father/his inner child and between different parts of me then.)

So back to the process.  My father's inner child begged me for protection and I had no choice but to obey him.  How was I to do that?  By making sure I was never better than him in cognitive achievements and always letting him outdo me in those areas.  Thus I created a glass ceiling that became a boundary for me for my whole life.  That glass ceiling made sure I never succeeded too much, I never let myself manifest my full potential and much more.

I had also realized that I made a vow to protect my father by never surpassing him.  The vow did not only pertain to my father but extended itself to anyone facing me who resonated with those vibrations Oh ... the flow of emotions.  I started making the long elaborated setup and this took me a long time because of all involved.  I added forgiveness to my father, and to myself.  I thanked the vow for protecting me and allowed it to dissolve.  So I released myself from its hold.  I made the same positive choice as in the former rounds.  I made many rounds giving a special space to each aspect, to the positive choice and the alternations too.  By the end I was spaced out so I took a long walk in nature to reconnect to earth.

The next day I was filled with energy and joy.  That evening I went back to the event ... nothing … no intensity at all!  And now it's a new day and I feel a reborn me.

Have a nice day and lots of light and love,

Iris Lahad


Explore our newest advancement, Optimal EFT™, by reading my free e-book, The Unseen Therapist™. More efficient. More powerful.